I Can't Watch This

I can't watch this, I can't watch this I can't watch this, I can't watch this My my my my TV makes me so bored Makes me say, oh my Lord What is this garbage here? Wanna cover my eyes and plug my ears It sucks, and that's no lie It's about as much fun as watching paint dry Lowers my IQ one notch And that's the reason why, uh, I can't watch I told you homeboy, I can't watch this Yeah, nothin' but trash and you know, I can't watch this Poke out my eyes, man, I can't watch this Yo, gimme that remote control, I can't watch this Talkin' 'bout sick shows There's America's Funniest Home Videos I can't believe my eyes When I see the kind of stuff that wins first prize Somebody's poor old mom falls down off the roof Lands right on the lawn, face first on a rake I hear they got it on the seventeenth take That's funny as a kick in the crotch And that kind of show, uh, I can't watch Yo, I told you, I can't watch this Change the channel now, man, I can't watch this Yo, pass the TV Guide here, sucker, I can't watch this Cosby Show and Rosanne Think I've taken 'bout as much as I can Judge Wopner, oh my You gotta be Rain Man to like this guy Thirty Something is alright If you like hearing Yuppies whining all night, can't stand Twin Peaks Wish they'd lynch those donut-eatin' freaks Those Siskel and Ebert bums oughta go home and sit on their thumbs That's word because you know, I can't watch this I can't watch this, break it down Here's how to order, money back guarantee Removes tough stains fast, it tastes more like fresh peanuts They keep going and going, don't hate me, because I'm beautiful Could be dandruff, our prices are insane Stop, Prime Time I'm pretty sure I'll be sick If I have to watch another stupid pet trick Or that guy with the real flat hair That goes 'Woof woof woof' and waves his fist in the air Those weird talk shows About transsexual Nazi Eskimos They're rude, crude and vile Just for a minute let's flip down the dial Flip, flip, flip, eww, I can't watch this Look man, I can't watch this I can't take this torture no more, I can't I can't watch this, pay the bills, station break, break it down Operators are standing, cubic zirconium necklace You're soaking in it, and our fabulous swimsuit issue When you've got a headache this big, read the book This is your brain on drugs, I've fallen and I can't get up Stop, Cable Time HBO and Playboy, Showtime and MTV I might like 'em more after my lobotomy Now why did I ever pay for this junk? I hooked up eighty channels and each one stunk Just brainless blood and guts And mindless T&A It's awful, it's putrid, it's crummy It's stupid, gonna throw my set away I can't watch this, I can't watch this I can't watch this, yeah I can't watch this I told you, can't watch this, too hip, can't watch this Get me outta here, can't watch this