Wondering Why?

[Intro] Deep down in this depression Is a cycle that comes back around My actions are my own For the cause is I fear Where I sit by the liar's side Just because I am hated And they conversate with me {x2} On about how we can sometimes Mature where emotion fades [Madrox] On the windows in my mind at night There some things going on, some of them are not right I've been locked in this house, in this abusive home No one is there on the couch, and I'm alone Inside of my head, things are unclear I don't rely on the person I see in the mirror And I don't die for the chance to be standing right here Sometimes I'm a smart ass when being sincere [Monoxide] I see everything's flashing, I wish it would stop There's something that makes me so nervous 'bout cops All their pushing and shoving and mace in my eyes It will only keep burning this hate that's inside of me Hitting and kicking me just for the fun And all I keep on thinking is "Go For his gun!" To protect and to serve are the words you should heed And if you don't we're going to watch you bleed [Hook] Wondering Why (Why?) Not giving up (No!) Nothing can break me Wondering Why (Why?) Not giving up (No!) Nothing can make me Wondering Why (Why?) Not giving up (No!) Nothing can save me Wondering Why (Why?) Not giving up (No!) Nothing can change me [Monoxide] She loves me and hates me, It's all just the same But I can't hear her screaming and yelling my name Now her face is all blue, and her eyes are all red From the bloodcells that just keep on popping instead of me (Help me, I'm burning and pushing away) Her pictures and memories and things she would say They keep coming and flashing So I keep on laughing, Bitch You never should of fucked my boy [Madrox] I'm in touch with my fear that's why I stay afraid And I'll stay that way until night turns to day And them nice words you say, will slowly mutate And become the better part of you that we all love to hate And while speaking on fate, I'm trying to relate To the ever growing destiny, and it's amazing shape They tell me I'm straight and then they diss me on tape There's a website debate, was it all a mistake? [Hook] [Monoxide] It just keeps calling me, and wishes my name Only moonlight was hitting the darkness again All my friends they are dead, but remain in my head So I choose to believe that they all are my enemies Telling me (DIE!) And alter the sky, that hell isn't real And heaven's a fantasy Capture me mentally, nothing substantually evident Except that my head's a little fucked up [Hook]