Psychopathic Psychiatric Care

Skit: Hello and welcome to Psychopathic Psychiatric Assistance! Please listen to the automated menu and choose from the following options that best fit your mood and/or symptoms If you suffer from necrophilia press one, but we highly doubt you're suffering If you are obsessive compulsive, press two one hundred times If you have multiple personalities, press three, four, five, and six If you are delusional, press seven and your call will be transferred to Niberau If you are co-dependent ask someone to press eight for you If you are paranoid we know who you are, what you want, and we're going to kill you Press nine and stay on line long enough so that we may trace your call If you are depressive it really doesn't matter which number you press because no one cares about you and we don't either 71717171 press dyslexic are you if If you have low self-esteem you should probly hang up as your call isn't worth our time If you're schizophrenic we're confident the voices in your head will tell you which secret number to press If you have short-term memory loss do you seriously remember what you're calling about? If you have a nervous disorder place your shaken hands on the phone and press whatever numbers you can until you hear a...