Defining Moment

They want me to say it all I've been waiting for the moment Yeah I ain't slept in months, got a lot that's on my mind 'Bout to take the ride of my life, a lot up on the line Life got it's moments, some of them define you Like losing the love of your life to try to find you Numb to it now, can't feel a damn thing Far from reality, closer to my damn dream Far from family, closer to my damn team More and more it feel like the same damn thing And so I ride for my brothers til the wheels fall I'd told 'em we'd be stacking paper till it's real tall People whining about the hands that I deal y'all Go and get it on your own, I don't really feel y'all This shit is cutthroat, I ain't never been the type But if you carry dead weight, it's hard to get your money right And so I'm on a diet, I've been cutting back I was giving everything and getting nothing back and I'm through with it I still remember sitting in the car You would get emotional, I never felt so far removed From the feeling of having to make it better My mind is all in the future, I left my heart in a letter I'm cold now, everything we had is old now Least that's what I tell myself, it helps me on the road now We used to talk about everything Now I feel like when we talk again, someone will have you in wedding ring It's like my best moves hurt the ones close to me They be asking when the hell did money mean the most to me? Since I got a taste and I left the comfort zone Now it's either money or blowing up everything we've grown This rap shit feels like everything I've ever known Locked up in the studio, never picking up my phone It's always some bullshit, I just need to be alone I don't want no distraction, I been in my zone Word is we getting love in the city Funny I feel it's like all I wanted from the beginning And now I'm too far away, figures though It's always been motivation for me to get bigger though Friends were ashamed of my little hobby until the women they wanted were digging my music And now they all be thinking it's chronic Pardon my trouble of separating real from the fake Everyone gassin' me up, I just be needing a break I just tell it like it is and they be feeling a way They say I'm trippin, I say I'm finally feeling awake Too much at stake, I ain't playing no games People guessing the suspects, I ain't saying no names It's family biz, you suckers don't know what family is I promise I see it clear, told the team we on the verge, guess that we'll see this year My fear is I'll get everything I wanted and nothing I need