Oakland Nights

[Verse 1: Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer] Step into my crib, everything smell like Coolwater And if you come into mine you know it's Drakkar Noir Now have a seat on this couch made of horse leather I'm told the horse that it's from could run fast and far Whoo, that shit is sexy Tell the maitre'd at your booty to expect me I'm solo and I'm flexin' but don't try to Soloflex me NordicTrack all day Squats in the living room, can I get a witness? The greatest aphrodisiac is physical fitness (Oh-oh-oh-oh) So take off your Guess and let go of your stress 'Cause the classiest shit is what comes next [Chorus: Sia, Andy Samberg & Akiva Schaffer] Silk robes and kimonos Silk robes and kimonos Change outta your own clothes These athletic days, but, oh, those Oakland Nights Silk robes and kimonos It's our pleasure to no-noes Pumps and pantsuits all day All work, no play, no way It's time for Oakland Nights [Verse 2: Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer] In the bedroom, champagne on ice I make erotic shadow puppets in the candle light Your hair's crimped, all frizzy 'cause you're frivolous I feel like Macho Man and you my Miss Elizabeth Sizzlish, do some crunches and some scissor kicks Body shaved slick like an exquisite fish Drag your Lee Press-On Nails down my hairless chest Now, pull my sash, my body shakes like a leaf Revealing the cloth of my cheetah-print briefs And I love the way your high-cut thong Make your butt long Now take 'em off But you know what to leave on [Chorus: Sia, Andy Samberg and Akiva Schaffer] Silk robes and Kimonos Silk robes and Kimonos Peel off your pleated polos These athletic days, but oh those Oakland Nights Silk robes and Kimonos I pound the taiko drum in your dojo Days in padded blazers Filing papers, no more It's time for Oakland Nights [Outro: Sia] Silk robes and kimonos Silk robes and kimonos I'm a pro when I bone but I do it pro-bono You work hard days so you deserve the Oakland Nights We're the Oakland Knights of the Round Table Plus I'll take you out to pizza at the Round Table Pizza, my favorite pizzeria in Oakland But bring a change, 'cause you can't wear your silk robe in