Never Had A Chance (Piñata Boy)

[Intro] Alright, this is a formal disclaimer; hahaha! Oh my gosh this song is stupid. I mean it doesn't even sound that good to be honest. I don't even know what I was doing when I wrote this. So, I can't be held accountable, it was... I don't know [Verse 1] Why do I do the things that I do daily? Its crazy, I use the excuse its the way that God made me But I-I-I'm nuts I fully admit it I committed myself for shucks What am I supposed to do? How do I continue with these problems? Do I sit out on the corner rambling on and on About Vietnam and Soviet nuclear bombing If you cracked open my skull all you'd see is top ramen I do things that don't make sense period I grab fresh piles of dog crap and sculpt pyramids I don't know who the dude in my mirror is I tell people I'm Ghandi, "Whats so bad about that?" I'm serious See, I don't know what happened But I guess when I came out and the nurse said slap him The doctor held me up, cocked back a bat and Started bashing, hard as he could laughing [Hook] They call me Piñata Boy I was beaten as a baby and they never told me why There wasn't even anything inside Now they call me Piñata Boy I never had a chance at a normal Upbringing, I was beaten since the day I was born [Verse 2] Now, now, now, don't get it twisted I use to not even know if I existed But now I do, so I guess that's progress I'm just on a trip I have not come off yet I walk into clubs and creep up to the bar And slip a chick the pill, and get her back to my car Get in the drivers side and unlock her door And before she even gets in, put it in gear and floor it Its a sad fact I can't ignore it I sun bathe when its 55 degrees and pouring I stand on hills and start screaming for Lauren I think libraries are fun and hockey games are boring My hairs orange, I stole Papa Bear's porridge Did Mama Bear, scurried off into the forest So now I can't go back to candy land I'm far, far away cause I got warrants [Hook] They call me Piñata Boy I was beaten as a baby and they never told me why There wasn't even anything inside Now they call me Piñata Boy I never had a chance at a normal Upbringing, I was beaten since the day I was born [Verse 3] My voice is raspy so I'm gonna calm it down Let me tell you all about when I was young and almost drowned There was a big canal, with some kite string across it I blind folded myself and tried to tight rope walk it I couldn't swim, they pulled me out black and purple I received mouth to mouth resuscitation from a huge snapping turtle I woke up and slipped it the tongue (come on man, gosh) What? I thought it was Wendy from the sand lot When I was young I thought Santa was the enemy So I filled up my chimney, with black widows and centipedes That faggot wasn't even real, you think its funny I left a 6 foot mouse trap for the Easter Bunny My mom lost her legs They found her in a pool of blood, and chocolate eggs And now she walks with pegs, that's what she gets her freaking doctors gay Yea, the one who delivered me. The one that hit me with the bat. You know like I said earlier in the song. Yea, he was the reason they call me.. [Hook] They call me Piñata Boy I was beaten as a baby and they never told me why There wasn't even anything inside Now they call me Piñata Boy I never had a chance at a normal Upbringing, I was beaten since the day I was born I never had a chance at a normal (had a chance at a normal) I never had a chance at a normal (had a chance at a normal) I never had a chance at a normal (had a chance at a normal) I never had a chance at a normal Upbringing I was beaten since the day I was born