Assume The Perpendicular

Slip on your Barbour jacket Jump in my old MG We’re off to the depths of Somerset To see what we can see see see We don’t wanna drink the cider We don’t wanna walk for miles We just want to go to a stately home Built in the Georgian style I can’t abide a horizontal life It’s time to rise Assume the perpendicular Jump up and down Make complimentary sounds And talk about nothing in particular Crunch up the gravel driveway Gasp at the grand facade Just for today we’re lords and ladies Oh what a gay charade! Lavinia loves the lintels Anna, the architraves Ben’s impressed by the buttresses Thrust up the chapel nave I can’t abide a horizontal life It’s time to rise Assume the perpendicular Jump up and down Make funny little sounds And talk about nothing in particular We’ll walk the grounds By Capability Brown Get lost for days Inside the manicured maze We’ll bump our heads Jumping on a four-post bed And we’ll ride for free On the ladders round the walls of the circular library I can’t abide a horizontal life It’s time to rise Assume the perpendicular Jump up and down, make wild ecstatic sounds And talk about nothing in particular Nothing in particular…