The Ballad of Simon Diamond
The Coral
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Simon Diamond sold his soul
Changed his name by deed poll
Started out as Simon Russell
Lived his life inside a nutshell
He couldn't take the public scorn
Changed from human to plant form
Now he's swapped his legs for roots
His arms and soil are in cahoots
What will become of Simon Diamond
He can water himself
But can't change the climate
That'll do
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