Suicide II

I sit on my front porch and light a cigarette in the middle of the evening There’s a thickness in the atmosphere around me As I tilt my head back against the fortress of my home all I can do is remember and wish these walls were painted blue I hold my troubles in my lungs and release their smoldered vapors to be free amongst the sunset I am personified in my own head as a better man than I’ve ever been And I want to be remembered as such Today my sanity found it’s self-established dominance over my mental state opposite it’s proper pedestal I’ll give anything for my happiness It slows the quiver in my lips and the coagulating ruby lifestream running thin lines down my wrists Today is a simile for struggling in nature I am of no design purpose or consequence I’m dismembering the congregation to find salvation in the gutters of the brothel hidden deep beneath the steeple Do not depend on others (Work out your own salvation) Do not depend on others (Attribute destiny to destination) Happiness. Happiness (I got these vultures cavin’ in man) Happiness. Happiness (Work out your own salvation) Happiness. Happiness (Do not depend on others)