The Tom Selloutkin Show

[Sister Souljah] What's up, sisters? You know we've ALL been played By a fast-talkin', fly-lookin' double chocolate Low-down CUTIE, but abusive brother before Well here's something for US to consider If you're goin with a brother and all you have Is his beeper number, that is not your man! If you've never met his momma, that is not your man! If you've never been to his HOUSE, that is not your man! And like my great-grandmother used to say "Who buys the goddamn cow when you can get ALL the milk for free?" You gotta think! GET OFF you knees! You gotta think! CLOSE your legs!! You gotta think! RAISE the standard for the black woman {*beeper goes off*} "Live from Hollywood, California, it's the Tom Selloutkin Show! Starring Toooooom Selloutkin!" [Tom Selloutkin] He-HEY! Well how is everybody today, huh? (HI, TOM!!!) Alright, I'm Tom Gomer Selloutkin And today we're gonna have REAL activist by the name of Sister Souljah Come on the show today and tell us how it is to be a black person Well first of all, me, Tom Selloutkin myself Am an Afro-American and I know ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about being black