Sometimes Part 2

[Intro] [Sha talking]: Yeah. J. Cardim. Look. I know some artists have done joints like this where they um, contradict themselves and flip flop but... I think more so, we as humans...we do that so...I had to revisit it. Fuck with me [Verse One]: Sometimes I think about my old songs I hear the beat and the rhyming and think "That is so wrong" Some verses I rambled and would just go on But then I gave you some food for real thought that most of y'all probably choked on I thought my joint Good Day was realer than most shit that you hear on the internet If it was Eminem or Kanye's song they'd have won two Grammys but me? I'm still in debt Sometimes I'm feeling conceited Other times I'm feeling defeated Some times I write sick bars, other verses I just space out my flows so you can repeat it I'm thinkin', "This could be a hit record" In the studio once I record it right The music's blastin', sounds classic, I get home the songs sounds like shit in the morning Damn Sometimes I wanna have a camera man follow me around while I'm walking So you can see when I'm performing and touring That I ain't flossing and balling, my life's annoying boring sometimes Sometimes I wish I had a little fame Pause Sometimes I wish I had B.I.G.'s fame Then again I might need B.I.G.'s frame Sometimes I think I'm going insane Sometimes I don't wanna be alone then Sometimes I wanna be on my own and Sometimes I wanna have me a drink Sometimes I wanna smoke and just sit there and think About My life Knowing I'mma die Don't know when Don't know why Know I can't change Know I can't cry But I sit and analyze about these things Sometimes I think about the first time I saw Hova I interned at the label, he was the boss over Look I used to want that spot I treated rap like I did with my jump shot and my cross over Practiced in the mirror Battled in the park Sometimes I think the deal I got and lost, it broke my heart Standing in the sun Still feeling dark I think I'm hotter now but I was hungry at the start Sometimes I listen to my first tape And I was so thirsty, a verse made the earth shake Back then I wrote with a pen I had first grade hand writing but I was damn nice in the worst way Sometimes I wonder who was listening When I was frequent on hiphopgame and shit They saw my ass as competition and A lot of young dudes probably prayed I'd slip Well I pray too Sometimes I'm hateful I wanna make music you relate to break through Barriers and stereotypes, I'm scared for my life Sometimes what you hear is my sight Other days I'm bitter and disrespectful My nights are real uneventful I be making turkey sausage and pancakes, nothing special Then I switch to the best booth studio in my guest room Murder in the booth, giving beats more than a flesh wound Sometimes I don't wanna be alone then Sometimes I wanna be on my own and Sometimes I wanna have me a drink Sometimes I wanna smoke and just... Sometimes I think about my, bachelor party Or wedding and a reception Then I think about the end of that groupie love and affection Damn I don't need it, my family is a blessing I've been blessed to be successful to share it might just be Heaven, fuck Sometimes I talk to my old broads You know, the ones I placed in the friend zone Sometimes they flirt, is that a faux pas Or do they want me to score in they end zone? It could be my ego Vein ass Leo, thinking I"m the Neo One day I want a little girl or an eho Then I'm with my nephew who is like a baby Debo Then I get scared What if I ain't cakin' and not financially prepared With shorty in my ear like, "You can be the hottest MC in the world But a baby can't eat your lyrics." Yes I'm aware Yeah A lot of kids want to rap for me And in they verse they slut and whores or they clappin' heat Sometimes I wanna kill 'em with my flow And other times I want to go to their school and join their faculty Sometimes I think of my old management And how we used to speak all the time Did they lose faith in all this rapping shit Or was it just some fault of mine? Sometimes I think about working and how it frightened me I thought rap was my purpose but that enlightened me Now I see that my journey is more than spitting these verses It ain't working, God why did you hire me? Sometimes I wish that you would fire me But I'm thankful for the job that's irony I know you got your eyes on the sparrow If I end up with a job at White Castle please keep an eye on me I might not make it man My life goes left, then right Then day, then night Then it all starts all over, it starts all over again Sometimes Sometimes I wanna walk away Sometimes I wanna walk away from it all [Excerpt from Network]