California

[Verse 1:] Ever since I got divorced Everything's been going right on course I've been riding a horse Doing a little horse is fun in shorts Relaxting, texting, sleeping Refilling glasses of Riesling What a great way to spend an evening I look so good I'm beaming Ever since I lost my job I started a blog It's been going so great It's about the ins and outs of the perfect date Film tickets and ratings To kiss in the first minute or waiting Just get it over with (That blog post got viewed the most) Ever since I got a nose job I've had a more appealing snoz It's not so big and bulky It's small and cute like Coqui Those little 22-ounce bottles I feel right at home after a swallow My collars aren't stretched out And more focused on my mouth [Hook:] Reinvent yourself! California! (4x) [Verse 2:] Ever since my dog died I haven't had to be at home I don't just walk around the block I tick to my own clock My rent's gotten a little cheaper I started seeing my friend Peter He had terrible allergies It made him a loud breather Ever since I stopped rapping I've been totally relaxed No more hiring a publicist Or trying to find fat checks I don't have to pretend Everything's going so well One of ten acts At a venue called Hell [Hook:] Reinvent yourself! California! (8x)