Nerd Lust

[Revenge of the Nerds sample] *Gasp* You're that nerd! God, you're wonderful! Are all nerds as good as you? Yes How come? Cause all jocks think about is sports All we ever think about is sex [Verse 1: Schäffer the Darklord] L-L-L Ladies and gentlewomen Lend me your ear I love every last one of you I wanna be clear It doesn't necessarily mean That i'm some fetishist freak But if i had to pick a favorite It would have to be geeks Oh those nerdy girls Those oh so purdy girls The wordy girls that love a joke Only-if-it's-dirty girls The flirty girls The blue jeans and t-shirty girls The Bert and Ernie girls? The pearls of the world I see you in every venue City and state You're often awfully awkward Baby i can relate When i play Cat People live and in your town You're the one in the crowd Howling, "Meow! Meow! Meow!" Tell me 'bout your kitties Do they fill you with laughter? And which cartoon characters Did you name them after? House is full of Stacks of dvd's And cd's You've seen Star Wars Even more Times than me Like me You find summer a bummer You've been bummed since the finale of Six Feet Under Another number bombed hard at my show But you got it You got a closet full of skeletons You bought at Hot Topic Can i ride your bike? I like ringing the bell I know you'll dance to hip-hop If you're drunk as hell I know that on a date No one will talk about sports And if you do have a thong on It's under boxer shorts How many Smiths' tunes can you recite? And which of your blogs Do you most frequently write? Which sci-fi languages Can you understand? And which instrument Did you play in your High school band? So many ways Our similarities are eerie We share so many Paranoid conspiracy theories You're watching Twin Peaks You know all the characters' names Quoting Aqua Teen and playing Video games I couldn't care less About your height or your size If your I.Q.'s high And you've got four eyes Twelve sided dice Elf dies And i'm lovin' it Not hot in spite of bein' a geek But because of it [Hook 1] Nerds Nerds I love those nerds Shallow, vapid, model types Are for the birds Now let me see you shake it (Nerds X 8) (come on) Shake your inhaler baby Freaks and Geeks You make me crazy Nerds Nerds I love those nerds Smug, aloof, hipster types Are for the birds Now let me see you shake it (Nerds X 8) Shake your inhaler baby Freaks and Geeks Make me so crazy [Breakdown] Yeah girl I was uh I was thinkin' about comin' over later With a box of white wine And a bottle of grape Snapple And i made this portrait of you Out of Legos [Verse 2] You're lookin' goody In a dirty hoodie Let me see Is that an "Ask Me About My S.A.T." Pin on your backpack strap? That speaks to me We pass hours Dungeon master powers D&D Your new animated avatar Looks hot Wait I got great big goosebumps I made your top eight Great, great I left a dozen comments All of them flattering Like when we kiss girl It's like Magic The Gathering Come a little closer girl No need to be frightened I'm not gonna bite I'm just a little near-sighted You are too? Ooh This ain't gonna hurt I wanna see your silhouette In your Strong Bad shirt Our glasses clink when we nuzzle Organic milk we both guzzle A couple hot nerds Pourin' over crossword puzzles Fillin' letters Wearin' sweaters In any weather Forever Feel the books of The Lord of the Rings Were better You and me girl Are gonna have some fun We'll play Simpsons chess Then watch season one Hours of Risk Tisk We'll quit when we're done And with the sun Comes a Daily Show rerun I brought my high school yearbook You wanna see What i looked like Back in nineteen-ninety-three? I was skinny and pasty And i had terrible hair And still do You too? Do you still have high school nightmares? Were you a loner Dark and brooding Cruising through school Anonymous? Or were you on debate team Hanging with the drama kids? Did you take shop? Did the jocks call you Tom? Did you ever dream of Blowing up a bomb at the prom? [Hook 2] Nerds Nerds I love those nerds Shallow, vapid, model types Are for the birds Now let me see you shake it (Nerds X 8) (come on) Shake your inhaler baby Freaks and Geeks You make me crazy Nerds Nerds I love those nerds Smug, aloof, hipster types Are for the birds Now let me see you shake it (Nerds X 8) Shake your inhaler baby Freaks and Geeks Make me so crazy [Verse 3] I've loved every last nerdy girl That's been in my life So much in fact i even made one my wife And my wife's name is also S.T.D Which stands for Schaffer the Doctor Cause she's a Ph.D I love you dorks I love you geeks Oh how i love you nerds Oh Although for this last verse I didn't write words So i'll go Meow meow meow Meow meow meow Meow meow Meow meow meow meow Girl Meow meow meow meow meow meow Meow meow meow meow And i'm out