Save Yourself

I might be dying sooner when I fight these nightly tumors I assume it’s likely to in times in spite my dicey psyche You know the drill, buy me screwdrivers to get me railed Until I’m hammered enough to fall asleep on beds of nails So take that hacksaw and saw this hack into a thousand pieces Put it in your mouth and teeth it, chew it ’til it’s ground between ‘em Drain my blood and use it when you write a page Describe the taste and tell me if I’m truly worth the ground I sleep in It’s the semi-psychotic Henny and vodka mix With some Remy Martin and a medley of monster flicks I’m on a mission for the ending of all of this I’m contradictive, full of empty intoxicants I’m a desperate, desolate mess of skeletons Who second guesses questions, intentions when all the messages Mix and sections of skin are left dissected and ripped, infected With pestilent hexes that exorcists fix, so check it I got two bad hands and still built this house of cards Just an average Jack up in the Club who thinks he found a Heart But I don’t go to clubs and don’t believe in love Or holding hearts in grips unless this fist is into which it’s bleeding from It’s bleeding from, it’s bleeding from, it’s bleeding from I look into the bleeding sun and whisper with my bleeding tongue All my poems are telling that the bleeding’s fun Until this carcass reaches harvest, telling me the bleeding’s done After birth, there’s just afterbirth And after that’s the aftermath and consequences ‘Cause after life there’s nothing that’s after death And after death there’s no afterlife And you’ll agree that eulogies and afterwords Are…words, after-burn from aftershocks And afternoons of afterthoughts So after you, I’ll follow you to Acheron And after all, while you can’t just save yourself From this place in Hell I’ll say farewell until the sun decays With eyes open hoping nowhere nosy poachers dug our graves The silence is talking, walk-in, we’ve all been in coffins Hostage to cautious responses, solemn and lost in the nonsense Often I follow my conscience, bottle and swallow my problems Wallow in hollow with processes, toxic hostile menages It’s just another itchy finger that I know expects to pull it And I’m in the line of fire every time you’re sweating bullets Because…(these nights) it’s getting harder now to go to (sleep tight) When everything is haunting me… Until I take my heart and squeeze it ’til the bleeding stops (Speak to God), but I’d rather go and (reach the stars) So I could pluck one out the sky to navigate inside this shallow grave If I can’t find my way back home Know that I’m safe in these catacombs I stand alone in the window with the casket closed And latch to hold the stack of bones Yeah this ship is on the path I roam, but that’s just home