'Three's A Crowd' Transcript

[Text message from Roman] Shit. Need help. Come to the depot quick, man [Phone call to Roman] [Optional] [Niko] Hey Roman, I got your text [Roman] Great, Niko I've got my hands full at the moment With these charming money lenders I know Maybe you should come to the cab office and help me out [Niko] I'll see you soon [Cutscene] [Cab depot office] [Roman] Come on, Dardan, what's your problem [Dardan] I don't have problem. You do [Dardan points a knife at Roman while Bledar smashes his computer monitor] [Roman] Don't be a dick, man, come on [Dardan] [Choking Roman] Where's your Russian friend now [Roman] He's not my friend, he's my loan shark [Niko enters] [Niko] Stop this [Dardan] Who are you [Niko] Get out of here [Roman] Niko [Niko] Yes [Dardan threatens Niko with a knife and Niko breaks his arm] [Dardan] Oh my arm. Oh [Niko] And what about you [Dardan] Help me. Help me [Bledar hops over the desk to help Dardan] [Niko] Come on, asshole [Dardan] Bledar. Help me [The Albanians run out of the depot] [Niko] Get out of here now and if you come back, I'll kill you You understand [Roman] You forgot this, you Albanian pricks [Brandishing Dardan's knife] Shit, Niko, what did you do? [Niko] He was going to stab me [Roman] Now he's going to kill you [Niko] Fuck him [Roman] Look at this mess. Screwed, again You want to know why I'm not living in a nice condo Banging four women. It's because of shit like this Assholes threatening me [Niko] Shut up! [Roman's phone rings] [Roman] Oh, great, Mallorie [To phone] Hey, beautiful. Huh. Yeah. Great. Uh, listen I'm having a bit of a problem at the office Um, I can't do it. Niko can do it. Huh. Do what Well, why would you want me then Well screw you, then [To Niko] Great girl. Can you do me a favour Mallorie needs a lift Can you go pick her up at the Hove Beach subway station [Niko] Yeah [Roman] Take the cab. She's got a friend with her Maybe someone you can date [Niko] Fuck you [Exits] [Roman] Oh, man, look at this crap. My computer and everything [At the subway station] [Niko] Get in, ladies [Mallorie] Hey, Niko, thanks for coming I should have known Roman would find some excuse not to turn up This is Michelle [Michelle] Hi, how are you [Driving] [Taking the ladies to Michelle's place] [Michelle] I live on Rotterdam Hill, up on Mohawk Avenue You know where that is [Mallorie] How're you finding America, Niko [Niko] Not exactly what I expected [Mallorie] Niko, you know what You need someone to show you a good time Michelle, how about you [Michelle] Mallorie. Stop it [Mallorie] Come on you guys. You're both single, you're adults Take her number, Niko [Michelle] Hey, I'd like to see you again, Niko You look like that kind of guy I want to get to know [Mallorie] You look like you just jumped off the boat, Niko Handsome man like you should get some new threads [Michelle] I think he looks fine the way he is [Mallorie] I don't think he even changed out of those things on the journey How are you going to impress a classy girl like Michelle [Michelle] I'm easily impressed [Mallorie] I know you are, sweetie, and I just don't get it [Driving] [Taking the ladies to Michelle's place] [Michelle] My place is over on Mohawk Avenue [Niko] I can find it [Mallorie] You're settling in pretty good, aren't you, Niko You're staying with Roman. He got you a good job And, all he needs to do now is find you a woman What you think of Michelle here [Michelle] Come on, Mallorie. This is embarrassing Are you trying to set us up [Mallorie] I'm trying to get you two together So Niko will stop taking up all of Roman's time [Niko] I do not mean to keep Roman away from you [Mallorie] I know you don't. He just loves you is all And, I think Michelle might too [Michelle] Come on [Mallorie] Alright, but you like him, right You both like each other so why don't you just go on a date It never hurt anyone. Here's her number, Niko [Michelle] It sounds like we aren't being given much of a choice on this one [Niko] No, I guess not [Michelle] Well, you look like the kind of guy I'd like to get to know, Niko [Mallorie] He looks like he can't afford to eat. Get yourself some nice clothes You got to look good if you're going to date a girl like Michelle [Michelle] I don't know, I think he looks interesting. Foreign [At Michelle's place] [Mallorie] Thanks for the lift, Niko [Michelle] Yeah, thanks. Give me a call sometime [Niko] See you soon, Michelle [Phone call to Roman] [Niko] Cousin, I dropped the girls off. The friend gave me her number But I don't think Mallorie likes my clothes so much [Roman] I know just the place for you, it's on Mohawk in Hove Go and get something a bit more twenty-first century [Niko] Roman, I have taken your Mallorie And, her friend where they wanted to go. Michelle gave me her number [Roman] This is a good first step The next step is to get some clothes that will impress I know a good place for you on Mohawk in Hove Beach Get something a bit more American [Phone call to Roman] [After purchasing some clothes] [Niko] Hey Roman, I got some clothes It looks like they brought the stuff in from the Old Country though [Roman] We must take what we can get. When the big money rolls in Then we will look real classy. Anyway, you have Michelle A classy girl for your arm. You should definitely keep dating her