Even After I Die

A question mark's on a question mark And insecurities connect my parts I thought you are me and I am you So I talk to myself 'til my face turns blue Ask me if my feet touch the ground I drift away and explore the profound A morph to satisfaction is the trip It's you... isn't it?... Father tell me what you think of me Please, tell me what you think of me The pressure and the weight comes in with the tide I tell you that I love you a thousand times Someone said a silver course lands my door Now question marks talk to me even more I'm tired.. and I wanna come home But all that pains me is the thought of my own The thought of you just reeks with divinity A spark by my heart is the symbol of the trinity I can understand that the stakes are high But I'd really like to know what I've done and why I'm floating in a sea of doubt when it comes to that It seems as though all of my thoughts are now acrobats I am you, now that's a thought to renege But in the thought that stops it seems to get big I wonder why father.. why it is what it is Because I am what I am?.. what gives? Alphabet soup brings uncertain T's A kiss on the cheek is more trouble for me Is it possible that I might decompose And reassemble with a spark and a rose I notice that oblivion follows me around As ode to forgetful mind is shot down Eternity is holding a rubix cube And everything inside it seems to be nude I just don't get it sometimes it's wierd It barely shakes but escalates into fear I'm so distraught that it now makes sense The perfect pony.. but you'll only get a glimpse Now someone tried to hit it with a stick of bamboo I wonder wonder wonder wonder who I grin as the era of the selfish fades And I'm looking at the skies through a pair of dark shades And I'm buggin I guess cause it makes me feel good There's so many things that I misunderstood I guess I'll never know.. it'd probably cut me like a knife I swore I spent my life trying to be christ-like But I love you father so I can't lie.. I think I'll still be scared even after I die..