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Fine china stacked by the kitchen sink
Aunt Tammy's in there claiming all the diamond rings
Uncle Bobby's loading up the TV set
The only thing they are grieving over
Is what they ain't gonna get
She's only been in the ground a day or two
I'm glad Mama ain't around to watch this family fued
Great gran daddy's shotgun started it all
She wasn't even cold
Before they ripped it off the wall
Wanda's fighting Angie over antique quilts
Nobody even waited for the reading of the will
If Daddy was here he'd beat us black and blue
I'm glad mama ain't around to watch this family fued
I'm watching it all go down in shame
Wish the whole house would go up in flames
Who gives a damn about a cedar chest
When we just laid her soul to rest
She's only been in the ground a day or two
I'm glad Mama ain't around to watch this family fued
She's probably rolling over in her grave
Cause the good lord giveth and the family taketh away
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