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EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY! SHERLOCK HOLMES! VS BATMAN! BEGIN! Batman: Nice hat, dork, you look like a duck I had Alfred read your books, he told me they suck I'll crush your British nuts until they're bangers and mash I've seen better detective work in Tango & Cash You chump, I kick punks like you off the streets While you and Velma here are solving Scooby Doo mysteries Nothing makes me laugh, but I bet your raps can So bring it on, bitch, I'm Batman! Sherlock Holmes: I once met a rich fellow who smelled of guano and pain Dr. Watson: Holmes explain Sherlock Holmes: I deduce this deuce stain as Bruce Wayne Dr. Watson: The billionaire? Sherlock Holmes: Yes, his wealth would allow this adversary of ours To afford the toys he needs Dr. Watson: Since he has no superpowers! Sherlock Holmes: You want a battle, bat? Bring it then Dr. Watson: I heard he has a British butler Sherlock Holmes: Good! Then he'll be used to getting served by Englishmen! You're a wack vigilante black pantied spud with no skill My sidekick's a doctor Dr. Watson: Because his flows are so ill! Batman: Shut up, nerds, I serve justice, so eat it My sidekick only comes around Robin: When he's needed! Boy wonder make you wonder how your ass got killed Bite harder than those hounds down in Baskerville I'll blast you with that bat-whack-rap repellant Rappel a building,snatch a villain then by dinner be chilling Gotta secret about your homegirl Irene Adler Took her back to my nest, to bam pow kersplat her I'll shatter that fiddle with a chop of the hand! Holy Conan Doyle, let's get 'em! Aw god damn! Batman: You're not smart, you're selfish, you endanger everyone's life Why don't you let your boyfriend here go home to his wife? Nobody likes you, not your brother, not your partner, not Scotland Yard! You'll die alone with no friends except that needle in your arm! Sherlock: This mustn't register on an emotional level... First, exploit childhood tragedy...then gesture with pipe... Watson finishes punchline...next, acknowledge compliment Conclude with killer catchphrase.... I believe your parent's homicide is why you mask your face You're shamed and traumatized and haunted by the vast disgrace Of watching like a passive waste as momma died and daddy was dispatched with haste! Dr. Watson: Holmes, you've cracked the case! Sherlock Holmes: You're a bat shit crazy basket case! Dr. Watson: Bloody good rhymes! Sherlock Holmes: I've got tonnes! Dissing these dynamic douchebags was elementary, my dear Watson WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE! EPIC! (NANANANANANANANA) RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!
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