Paying Dues

[Verse 1] I’m trying to pay my rent, pay my dues Pay for the drugs that I gave in to Spent a pay check on some new tight shoes Now I eat cereal at dinner time too Still layin' low with the winter time crew Looking for Aphrodite, one day I’ll find you I would go wherever you are if only I knew But it takes time boo, I know when I see you I’mma say Woah Skin tight dress like Woah, body something I ain’t never seen before Make my brain straight Blow, maybe I’mma meet you at a show But until then I’mma focus on the flow, and I mean it My mind is such a board game, tell me have you seen it? Battling my judgement, giving in to demons I’m sick of all the other parts of life intervening ‘Cause the music and rhyme is when I find true meaning Television’s got my generation near sighted Part of me wants to stay out but I fight it For what? A big mac and a few bucks? A bud light and a new truck? Damn, what the fuck? Everything’s all messed up, but speaking my mind ain’t tough I almost gave up on something I've never tried for Something I rely on, something I would die for Smashed in the side door, looking in the sky for An answer to rid of the cancer that spread In my mentality, skewed my reality Who would know this fallacy almost lead to fatality? Ninety-five in a thirty-five, momma cried Yet I couldn’t even look her in the eyes All shame that followed I chased with a swallow But I never found a letter in the bottom of a bottle, no Everything from then on I just let it go And anything that hurts I don’t let it show I could give a fuck 'bout the radio ‘Cause anything I have to say is something they ain’t even know If you remember one it’s just breathe and Don’t get too caught up living in the past My love didn’t last, but if it didn’t pass It never would’ve lead me to this task, and that’s to ask [Bridge] Why am I here? What is God? Am I just some stardust or am I more? I’m spinning around, losing my ground I need you right now, oh [Hook] Won’t you hold me when I’m down, lift me when I’m down Please don’t let me drown, I don’t want to drown Won’t you catch me before I fall, I’m trying to give my all Searching for something, something [2x] [Verse 2] Wasting away, wasting my days Hoping I’mma make it out this mundane phase I keep having dreams on a one way train Where I end up at a station in a no name place As a no name race and I’m caught up in a chase Got the evils of the world creeping at a fast pace Wake up in fluster, sweat on my face I ain’t too religious but I still say grace And I don’t know, why even try when the sky Is all covered in smog making clouds' eyes cry Bouncing my soul off a man-made trampoline On my heart I can feel the devil trampling On my life I see politicians gambling Will I make it past 30 or not? Watch ‘em bet another M and simply throw it in the pot So if I smoke pot they will see me get locked Hope not, so I won’t stop, ’til I’m on top No cop I won’t coop., gimme that shock If it need be, giving into fighting that’s easy But I got too many other people that really need me So beating on my ass is a freebie, proceed please But remember that we’re on the same team And red white and blue are the colors I am bleeding Fear is what you’re fleeting, propaganda's what you’re eating [Bridge] Why am I here? What is God? Am I just some stardust or am I more? I’m spinning around, losing my ground I need you right now, oh [Hook] Won’t you hold me when I’m down, lift me when I’m down Please don’t let me drown, I don’t want to drown Won’t you catch me before I fall, I’m trying to give my all Searching for something, something [2x]