This Friday I Woke Up At 2PM

started drinking alcohol at 3pm at 11pm i went to a party wearing the same clothes i wore on thursday at 12:30am the guy i lost my virginity to told me he is having a baby at 1:30am i ate drugs in the bathroom without telling anyone i don't know how to maintain relationships most of the people i've had sex with have negative feelings about me now starving to death during sex is something i would like to do this week every time i look at my computer i fight the urge to open a word document and list everything i ate that day here is what i ate today: coffee, curry vegetable thing from whole foods, plum i am most comfortable around people who criticize me because i feel like anyone who isn't constantly criticizing me is lying or expecting me to be something different seems insane that you need money to do things like develop a drug addiction, or move across the country i don't identify as 'depressed' even though i feel depressed seems unfair that i only get to feel a finite amount of things in my life lately i have been assuming that dried fruit has more calories than regular fruit i feel like 400 dead jellyfish in the middle of a freeway