The Roommate From Hell

[RA Nate v/o] Welcome to Mirrielees orientation. My name’s Nate, and I’ll be your RA for this year Today we’ll be moving into our dorms and building community So go get your keys from the main office, come back And get ready to meet your roommates…alright?? [MC Lars] He was the roommate from Hell! He was the roommate from Hell! [Verse I] Satan was my roommate, so junior year was Hell He lacked social skills and had a pungent smell When your roommate is the devil it can be extremely whack Putting posters on the wall of Trapt and Nickelback Until the break of dawn he’d be mutilating sheep “It’s 4 am Satan, can you please go to sleep?” I can’t have girls over when the dorm smells like Sterno When did room 56 become Dante’s inferno? He likes death and destruction I like radio and art He likes holding down Christians and reading Jean-Paul Sartre While I’m going to class studying my notes He’s eating baby fetuses and sacrificing goats He tricks the freshman girls into eating apples Holding black masses down at the campus Chapel Should have never moved in, wish I were dead Should have found a place off campus on Craig’s List instead [Hook x2] He was the roommate from Hell, his name is Lucifer Someone call a priest, and bring the crucifer He was the roommate from Hell leaves his pitchfork in my bed I’m in a satanic panic cause he is messing with my head [Deep Voice v/o] Yo pass that giant balloon of helium over here, yo [MC Lars] Okay but, wait, Satan…that’s too much! [Verse II: mc chris] Boy you need a bitch slap Not my fault we’re mismatched You geek out over Beakman’s world I dig on world of Witchcraft You’re thinking that I’m riff raff, huffing on a dishrag I am just a player, playing Slayer then I kick back I know I reek of sulfur, leave the shower curtain open I come home drunk, make crank calls To Queens and then Hoboken But college is like Salem, all these bitches be so smokin’ If you’re thinking that I’m leaving that I’m thinking that you’re jokin' I gotta share my bunk with this post punk chump Calls this place a dumb says, “You’ve been through my stuff” I wish you’d go to Hell I say, Hey that’s where I’m from! Blasts Death Cab and Devo he’s too emo to get crunk I was a very nice boss down in Paradise Lost I had very nice bling cause my minions mind floss To hell with college, this is knowledge at a very high cost Gotta go do some blow with that ho…Kate Moss! [Hook x2] [Outro: mc chris] Lars you’re causing laughter when you call yourself a rapper dude How many Dead Milkman albums are there named after you? I always got beer. I always got weed. Best roommate ever if you’d ever ask me!