Hot Girls Make Guys Do Really Stupid Things

Lyrics by MC Lars Music by MC Lars & PJ McCombs They burned down Troy to get you back Young thing, beauty queen, baby got back! They burned down Troy to get you back Young thing, beauty queen, baby got back! Since the dawn of time, it’s always been true Hot girls – guys will do anything for you It’s not misogyny – because men are dumb Unfortunately we always succumb Paris met this girl on his trip to Sparta And gave her more power than the Magna Carta 36-24-36 see, Helen of Troy rocking size double D He said, “Hey baby let’s flee to Troy I’ll be your boy toy, forget the hoi polloi So you’re married to a king who runs Ancient Greece? They doesn’t scare me,” and they sailed northeast He said, “love conquers all” her husband said “conquer this” Demolishing Troy with 1000 angry ships (ooh!) Love’s a battlefield, so Paris got iced Helen married his brother – and that’s not very nice [Chorus] Hot girls will make guys do really stupid things Hot girls will make guys do really stupid things Hot girls will make guys do really stupid, really stupid Girls will make guys do really stupid things (Some call it fate, while some call it whack But girls own guys and that’s a fact Some call it fate, some call it whack But girls own guys and that’s a fact) There was Lady Macbeth, beautiful red hair Who pushed her man to be a king and millionaire He said “I’m a thane! There is none higher” She said “become king, and they’ll call you sire” The murder rampage his wife inspired And he didn’t stop killing ’till he retired Remember John Hinckley Jr.? He fell for Jodie Foster In 1980 he tried to join the roster Of Lee Harvey Oswald and John Wilkes Booth Stepping up to bat like (who?) Babe Ruth To win Jodie’s heart with sweet innovation Attempting presidential public assassination Busting caps in Ronald Reagan like he was 50 cent Like “look Jodie I love you” – his romantic intent But Reagan survived, and they locked Hinckley away And Jodie won’t return his calls to this very day [Chorus] And I’ll put it on the table, the ladies get me too I fall for them at shows, but wait I’m not through I knew this girl named Dana who lived in Carmel Valley Brunette with green eyes, a young Kirstie Alley You think you know someone when you talk about life When she lives down the road when you come home from school that’s nice We hung out over break there was tension in the air But then I went on tour – so what? So there She called me in Seattle and I called her back She said “I can’t wait to see you”, so how about that? I drove down south to see her, feeling kind of good It something good should happen, then I thought it would But I got a flat tire and then I got lost I got stuck in traffic and I was breathing exhaust I showed up we hung out she showed me her dorm She gave me a hug, welcoming and warm She said, “Stay the night, it’s too late to drive back P.S. we’re just friends” Okay, what? Whack And here’s the worse part: I left my favorite shirt on her floor Public Enemy, the enemy strikes black. Geeze [Chorus] This song serves as a lesson. For any guy who’s done stupid things for a girl. Like, if you let her borrow your acoustic guitar you got when you were twelve, and learned all these songs on, and then didn’t get back from her, because you went to college, and she went to Seattle, and you didn’t see her, and she wouldn’t get the guitar back to you, because apparently she gave you something stupid, which was of equal value, but not really, because that guitar’s really nice, it was made in Brazil, and it has nice nylon strings, that’s what I’m talking about