Robot Dog

[Verse 1] I got an allergy, for every pedigree So I got myself a robot dog that's Japanese But yo, he's hard to please He's always gotta pee But he never sips a drip This chip is playin' me The way it plays ladies, is such a sight to see He gets more digits than I could inside my wildest dreams He plays the hoes instead of playin' fetch with me He sniffs the toes of Tiffany and Stephanie That brings up Emily, she was my latest squeeze Robot dog stole that girl right out from under me Sometimes I wonder why I supply the energy To my mortal enemy that should be a best friend to me [Hook] Robot dog! He down tequila out of Tommy navel Robot dog! He drinks his owner underneath the table Robot dog! I'm afraid this foe is fuckin' fatal I'm about to go pre-natal, end up in a baby cradle Ro-bot-dog, turn him off, motherfucker! Say turn him off! I say ro-bot-dog, turn him off, motherfucker! Say turn him off! [Verse 2] He never pays the rent, he kicks me outta bed Well I'm the pissed submissive, he's the fuckin dominance And it's been really tense, I'm feiging impotence I got a robot dog and haven't gotten any since All my pals are fucking meloncholy malcontents From Malcolm in the Middle to Malcolm X He eats filet mignon, I'm eatin fuckin Alpha-Bits And the motherfucker just left me the consonants I hold his leash while he gets all the compliments He gets more attention than a one eyed elephant He's in the club, I'm in my car out of my element In a Honda Element, feelin' irrevelant But it's on like it's Vaughn comma Vince I wanna be gone like I'm Jon Favreau havin' a fit He's surrounded by chicks rubbin' their D cup tits I flip the toilet lid, read a Maxim mag, bust a couple kids [Hook] [Beat stops and Robot Dog barks a few times]