Ratz

[Mc chris] This one goes out to all the cuties in the quad Walkin kitty corner, with the itty bitty bod Telescopin out the window, waxin wise while you walk I stalk the fox box to the party on lock Security check soon my ID's inspected In the elevator waitin to get wreck-ed Open the door then get floored by the heat You get passed a J while they play "Paul's Boutique" Get a plastic cup and ice unless you like it neat All the girls stand up, all the guys take seats Smoke fills the air, you fill in Denise On your major, on your minor, on the Middle East, the fo'sheeza High plains drifter this sorority sister Let the belt loop lead you to her liquor elixir Smellin better than a bubblegum scratch'n'sniff sticker You lick, shoot, suck, then duck out even quicker A mad dash to her crib, my roomie is a geek He's playing Galaxies, makin friends on Dantooine So I'm climbin up a tree, beers clingin to my teeth Miss the windowledge, hit the hedge, land upon my keys, oh! [Hook 2X: mc chris] I am a dorm rat, that is a fact Jack Lookin at incense, playin with warm wax Hittin on the honies at the vendin machine The one hitter, trade dinner, all you need's an ID (I said) [Mc chris] Oh! Plaid pajama bottoms or plaid pleated skirts Everything you girls wear makes me stare at the dirt If I had balls I'd flirt with y'all in study hall Do the geek talk 'til your eyes roll back into your skull But I'm a freek, spelled F-R-double-3-K When you're walkin my way, with my pockets I play I can't say, "What's-your-name, care to chat for a bit? It's me Brian, that guy, from that class, Russian Lit? Care to sit, have a chip, care for some fun dip Dostoevsky doesn't impress me, what you think of that shit?" But I don't, I just twitch and I itch in my pants Play my Gameboy Advance, 'til she's finally walked past A mad dash to my crib where I get on my blog InSearchofSpock.com, check it out if you want That's the steam blowin scene where I reign supreme Webster's my Friendster, I run the message boards for Ween It's a mental mall for teens, it's a paradise on earth But in a way it's like a curse, faster than a Google search I just sit here and drink beer while my roommate flirts At some party, with some hottie who's all into Fred Durst It makes my heart burst, and yet I do nothin Just get on the web and start bitchin and frontin A dot com curmudgeon who's love life is sufferin It's the rope or the oven, or the hope I find love in the end [Hook 2X: mc chris] I am lab rat, that is a sad fact Shinin my test tubes, cryin in restrooms Dorm life blows if you've got no place to go I call my mother everyday, I say I wanna (go/come) home