Viagra (Skit)

[Ludacris] Oh god! Oh god! Ugh.. [911 Lady] 9-1-1 What's your emergency? [Ludacris] Yes ma'am I got a hard problem, I got a hard problem... [911 Lady] Calm down sir, it can't be that hard, Okay? [Ludacris] No, no it can't, it-it can't... It is! My dick, it's been hard for over eight hours and it just won't go down! [911 Lady] Excuse me?! [Ludacris] I took one of them Viagras for the first time... [911 Lady] Word?! [Ludacris] And the first one didn't do anything, s-so I took another one... [911 Lady] OK.. [Ludacris] And now my shit harder than titanium in this motherfucker, I've been knocking shit over... [911 Lady] Damn, I ain't had no dick in 6 months.. [Ludacris] Why don't them shits come with directions?! I don't know what to do, ma'am help! [911 Lady] Hey girl, Lisa! [Lisa] Hmhm--? [Ludacris] --My god, what was I thinking... [911 Lady] --Cover my shift, forward this call to my cell and confirm his address! [Lisa] I got you! [Ludacris] Swear to god imma kill Tyrone and them niggas, I ain't never listenin' to them niggas again man, I swear! [Lisa] Mmm... Calm down, sir help is on the way! [Ludacris] I can't believe these bitches set my dick up for failure! [911 Lady] Well, what happened anyway? [Ludacris] I had, I had invited this chick over, you know what I'm sayin', this bitch I knew from a long time... [911 Lady] Mm-Hmm... [Ludacris] And she said she was with her friend, and they both wanted this thang, man, like they both wanted to jump me off, you know what I'm sayin', and then-- [911 Lady] --Poor thang!-- [Ludacris] --it started going to voicemail, man I HATE these bitches, man why do they need to be doing this stupid shit?! [911 Lady] Mm-Mm, sir, help is in the neighborhood!--Is it the last house on the right? [Ludacris] ...Right on the right... right? No, they right, THESE BITCHES AIN'T RIGHT! [Lisa] Mm, don't worry about that! Momma gon' take care of you! Oh, is the one with the blow up dolls in the front? [Ludacris] The one in the cut, with the furry bushes... it's got some furry bushes, yes it does... I done wacked off like three times! I don't know what else to do! [911 Lady] Well, you ain't gotta do that no more! (opens and closes door) [Ludacris] What the hell you doin' in my house?! [911 Lady] Nigga, where the drinks at?!