The Rest

[Verse One] I thought I had romance, no chance till I met you Right next to my whipper in a fly sweatsuit Like this was Boyz N' the Hood and I'm Tre You didn't have dishes to do and there was no one home at Grandma's place I blew kisses to you when I'm on stage At least I was picturin' you when I blew 'em at that chick with blonde waves You know, I might have banged her too But since you wouldn't want A.I.D.S., you should be thankin' Lou I had a condom on (Hey!) Girl I would rob a bank for you Catch a shank or two But I won't treat you like my last girl I'll never strangle you You're my angel food and I want my cake and taste it too So, get straight into your naked suit and your favorite shoes Not to cheapen our sex life, but I got them tapes of you And if you leave me the next night they might turn up on Pay Per View Psych! You know I like to play with you I wouldn't do you wrong, but if you ever break a date with Lou, I'll screw you in a song [Hook] (JJ) Darlin', when it's for real this how it feel (LL)All my other girlfriends were just practice (JJ) Stay on my mind all of the time (LL) Fact is my last chick was nothin' but an actress (JJ) Baby, you stole my heart right from the start (LL)I'm tellin' you, you're foot would probably fit in Cinderella's shoe (JJ) Damn! You went and stole the whole show! Now hear the horns go (Both) Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo [Verse Two] You're the best thing that's happened, girl, the light of my life Like ya despite the fact we fight every night While we're wrestling I might get a knife But just for threatenin' I wouldn't chance your implants to spring a leak. I like 'em that size Girl, you got a little dyke in your eyes Which is cool. You might be surprised I like bitches too, not just you And if you down to knock the boots Then I found a prostitute who'd love to rock with you tonight if it's cool Cause I'm in the mood for love or fuckin' some anyway And friendship this authentic doesn't come everyday It's one of the many ways with which I tell you, "I love you" But sometimes I think it's swell to just fuck you [Hook] [Verse Three] I wanna pledge my love and loyalty to the one who spoils me Rubs and oils me from head to toe you'd never know I wasn't royalty STEP 1: To let you know how important your heart is I carved this one from the chest of a farm pig with a sharp BIC razor STEP 2: I'll lay it next to your head While you're undressed in your bed dreamin' of sex that we've had STEP 3: I'll tether your legs together and tie your hands down And prance round the room while I pull my bloomers and pants down STEP 4 I'll paint a red cross above the headboard And set forth to bumpin' uglies till your butt gets bed sores But 5 is my favorite My video of the guys that you've laid with gettin' beatin' till they lie on the pavement Now that's romance for ya When you need to finance lawyers to get Diane Sawyer's lyin' ass off ya I ain't no wife beater Bitch I'm in love Gimme some room so I can get this blood rinsed from my gloves [Hook] You're all that I need I'll be there for you "But the rest are doo doo" - Chubb Rock I'll hold the door and pull out ya chair for you "But the rest are doo doo" If you had a fanclub I'd be in there too "But the rest are doo doo" Cause you'd love me fat and old or with thin hair too I'll squeeze you tighter than a swimwear suit