Wine Country

[Verse 1] It’s your birthday comin’ up, the 6th of July – yeah Got a present so sweet, it’ll make you cry – uh It’s a treat for your lips, girl, gonna make your mouth water You been achin’ for this; it’s just what the doctor ordered [Verse 2] Climb into my ride and lean the seat way back We about to go to heaven; ain’t nothin’ you gotta pack – uh Close your eyes real tight; open your throat up wide ‘Cause soon I’m gonna fill you up inside [Verse 3] Bitch, I’m takin’ you to wine country To show you you’re the only girl for me We gonna take the 101 ‘Cause the 5 is for faggots (Golden State faggots) [Verse 4] Gonna shack up at a B&B Ask them to recommend some wineries But we’ll only patronize the ones That are family owned (Main Street, not Wall Street) [Verse 5] Ain’t gonna spare no expense; this vineyard’s all up on my dick – uh I’ll drop a thousand on a Chateau Cheval Blanc if it’s sick – yeah I’m-a make it rain; throwin’ so much cash I’m scarin’ ya But for real, if it rain, they got an indoor tasting area [Verse 6] Later on, sex you up by a lake right as the sun is setting Explore your whole body; not one part I’ll be forgetting You’re gonna feel just like a princess in a golden palace But no oral on this trip; girl, I gotta save my palette – uh [Verse 7] Mad respect for wine country Sometimes we’ll have to pay a tasting fee They’re in place to offset the cost Of maintaining the vineyard (Luxury isn’t free) Break it down… [Breakdown] If we get peckish later on, we’ll get a charcuterie plate – uh That’s meat and cheese and olives; all that shit that tastes great – yeah Don’t look so surprised, girl My tastes are refined, girl [Verse 8] Just ‘cause I got a grill and I’m a street hood don’t mean for a thrill that I can’t eat good I didn’t come to Napa just to tap ya fly, tanned booty – nah While we here, gonna sample wines both dry and fruity – ohhh Girl, you fuckin’ fine, on fire in dem jeans And if we’re drunk on too much wine, we’ll hire a limousine We’ll go get some virgin olive oil; hump in it ‘til morning ‘Cause the fact that I know how to classify tannins makes you so damn horny [Verse 9] That night while you’re on top of me We’ll review the finer points of viscosity I’ll learn you up on malolactic fermentation – Bitch, their ain’t no stoppin’ me And when my junk’s in your mouth, you’ll detect a note of wood The color and the clarity’s beyond reproach ‘cause it’s aged real good And when I bust a nut, make sure to swish it around Then exhale through your nose as you swallow it down – uh [Verse 10] That’s how we roll in wine country I know some places we can drink for free My Dad went to school with a guy Who writes a wine-tasting column (It’s called “Grape Expectations”) [Verse 11] We’ll commune with nature every day I brought two copies of The Artist’s Way Sunrise is the perfect time To do our Morning Pages (Stream of consciousness writing) Girl, get your sweet ass in my Maserati ‘Cause we about to kick it like Paul Giamatti