Judgment Day // Valley Idols

VERSE 1 In two rooms, separated Questions come And there’s nowhere to hide Coffee on the table See if he’s able To figure us out A few sloppy mistakes Gave us away And the law tracked us down, down A good cop ultimatum An offer to make me Sing of my love But I know… CHORUS I’ll admit to doing a crime Even end up doing the time If it means I’m saving a life And can look into his eyes On Judgment, judgment, judgment day (x3) VERSE 2 No handshake was needed A Faustian agreement That I’d take the blame Brown bodies in chains History showed me early This would be my fate His mama did the same Gave her life just like I Something like legacy A body on the pavement Lifeless and naked No one knows but me What we made… CHORUS I’ll admit to doing a crime Even end up doing the time If it means I’m saving a life And can look into his eyes On Judgment, judgment, judgment day (x3) OUTRO He follows me wherever I am Holds my hand and pulls me down from my 5’10” stance Admires the curve of my vertebrae, never afraid that my skin might fray And always certain that my ligaments and tendons were made with him in mind On summer Sundays, when we drive to the beach together, I let him sit in the passenger seat Even though he’s not big enough to do so He kicks and screams Throws tantrums when I put him in the back Does not want to be forgotten As time goes on He’s further from my thoughts His cheekbones make me cringe. The way they sit there Strong, molded, smooth, dark, and dewy A proclamation of the man he would’ve grown up to be The days he slips loose from my thoughts, he reminds me of his omnipresence At that point between wake and sleep, rolls over to nestle up beneath me And breathes heavy on my neck. I sometimes wake in sweats Shaking at the thought I may have suffocated him But he’s never there Curious he’s always asking questions. Where he came from, where he went Why he looks so much like me, but not Why I act the way I do when we cross paths with toddlers in the promenade Why we do not celebrate his years with cake and candles Why he never got a name Guilts me into letting him call me mommy. And when it echoes from my mouth It shakes at first with trepidation, then charges unstoppable like a freight emerging from a cave He loves to close his eyes, hold his breath, and make wishes in the tunnels on PCH The way we gasp for air melodically and reach for sunlight at the end -- Both our inside and outside bodies together in unison -- I know he is mine. He never tells me what he wants Because he’s superstitious. He gets that from his father, but I doubt he knows He says the shore is the first place he remembers me taking him to, and the water, on the days it’s blue Reminds him of his birthday VALLEY IDOLS No one’s supposed to be their own role model Looking up to socialites and coked-out models I made it out alive with a heart so hollow Worshipping the shallow In the valley of the fake idols (Did I scare you?)