Everyday Normal Guy

[Hook] I'm just a regular everyday normal guy Nothin special 'bout me motherfucker!! I'm just a regular everyday normal guy When I go to the clubs I wait in line motherfucker!! I'm just a regular everyday normal guy I got six hundred dollars in the bank motherfucker!! I'm just a regular everyday normal guy And my sexual performances are average [Verse 1] I work at customer service for a phone company I make twelve bucks an hour but that's all I need I live in a small apartment on a quiet street I don't go out too much, I like to watch TV I can't afford a car I use public transportation I don't mind, I read 'til I reach my destination Sometimes a newspaper, sometimes a book The amount of money I save, the shit is off the hook And I'm not very good with the women I'm a pretty shy person and I'm average lookin Last time I had sex was in 2003 And I am ashamed to admit, but it wasn't free [Hook] I'm just a regular everyday normal guy I get nervous in social situations motherfucker!! I'm just a regular everyday normal guy I get constipated once a month motherfucker!! I'm just a regular everyday normal guy... And I make pretty good spaghetti sauce, motherfucker!! I'm just a regular everyday normal guy And I get scared when I go see the dentist [Verse 2] I'm the Pauly Shore of everyday life: Easily forgettable, and I'm not very liked I have an "According to Jim" personality I'm as entertaining as a fuckin STD If you wanna mess with me I think you probably can Because I am not confident and I'm weak for a man I'll just roll up in a ball while you kick me in the back Yeah honestly, I probably, won't fight back And I don't have many friends that would back me up My friend Steve would, but he doesn't look very tough (You want, some of this bitch?) If you rarely get laid put your hands up If you're not well paid put yo' hands up If you got a pet cat put your hands up And if you got a bad back put your hands up (I hurt my back two summers ago moving a fridge) (And ever since then it's just, not the same) (Y'know it, it gets pretty, it gets pretty sore) [Hook] I'm just a regular everyday normal guy My parents, are really nice people motherfucker!! I'm just a regular everyday normal guy I'm somewhat afraid of heights, motherfucker!! I'm just a regular everyday normal guy I like the show "Grey's Anatomy" motherfucker!! I'm just a regular everyday normal guy And I'm pretty good at makin paper planes