Middleman

I was sitting in a diner With a girl named flo She wouldn't say yes But she couldn't say no She said "darling, can I get a middle man? " She was engaged to a fellow On the lay a way plan But she carried all her money In a coffee can She said "darling, can I get a middle man? " The cook looked over With a short order face Dropped a fork And he saw flo's legs Straightened his apron And burnt my eggs I got competition Everywhere I go These days She was leaning on the juke box And was lookin' real good Like natalie wood On a pontiac hood I said "darling, I think I need a little hand" Ya see, I've seen my downs I've seen my ups I seen miniature dogs In coffee cups But "darling I ain't never seen a middle man" Flo talked slow Like real wet paint She said "a middle man's there When the other ones ain't He's got a left handed manner That leans to the right Sleeps all day And keeps it up all night ..." ... I got an aunt in ohio And a boat that won't row Some veterans insurance And nowhere to go "darling, can I be your middle man? " (spoken) If I could get the money in that coffee can I could open me up a lemonade stand Send all the kids off to pakistan Make flo happy If I can Jerry mahoney and johnny b. goode Are gonna buy me a house in hollywood "darling I think I got the perfect plan" "we're gonna save half a dollars And sell 'em to france Buy us a record And learn how to dance And darling I'll always be your middle Darling go buy a griddle Darling I wanna be your middle man