Nineteen

[Verse] My lil brother 19 he in streets crazy Thinkin he grown & can't nothin phase him I try to reel him in but they keep baitin' him Same dad different mommas but the same genes I thank God my mother raised me I try to tell him every cliche the media feeds us About black men, diseases, deceased or illegal From halfway across the country it's not easy to reach him I apologize if I freeze when I'm speakin That don't mean I'm stupid it means that I'm thinkin & my reasons for thinkin Get as deep as the sea is Heavy burdens quake the earth when my feet hit the cement & recently, I lost 3 aunties 2 of em not blood but still I bleed They helped raise me I mean I really had a village in the 80s I know u feelin all alone momma Down there in Stone Mountain but I'm just a phone call Away, I think about you everyday You moved back home when I was 19 but you set me straight I cried cus I seen my momma cry when her sister died It felt like a Mack truck just hit my side In an age when everything is digitized I probably needed to go through it to feel alive Cus I done seen my homie in a casket 12 or 13 not really knowin what just happened Seems like a couple days before we was just laughin The crazy part was that my other homie did the blastin Girls cryin like some Tony winning actresses But those was real tears though Happiness on zero imaginin his fear Before that my biggest concern was imaginary heroes I remember it like it was years ago Or yesterday, same thang Ain't changed, same pain That I never really spoke about since the 8th grade Crazy Rappin bout pain really ain't my thang But I thank God I'm here today to write on a blank page