One for the Griot

I like how, when you turn the intercom up Like all that little background noise When the beat comes in That's real smooth man Fuck studios, just happen to be here Aight, whatever [J-Live] Yo He woke up in a daze, back achin' Breath smellin' like liquor, dick smellin' like sex Head throbbin' like the bass from the club last night No idea how he left, needless to say, perplexed As he looked around the room that he never been in Candles all around the bed, sheets quite feminine Bucked naked with his kicks on Breakaway jeans, drawers and sweater were all on the bedroom floor He heard singin' from the shower from the bathroom door Sounded like Melba Moore but he couldn't be sure She had a sexy ass voice but she was so off-key Couldn't 'member how she looked, couldn't wait to see Hopin' that it was the girl, third floor of the club The one that let him grab her ass when they twisted the dub Or perhaps it was the dime from the guest list line Either one and several others would've suited him fine From the bed to the bathroom, a voice said "come in" Gradually now, he starts to remember Peeped through the shower curtain, like bachelor number three Pleasantly surprised to see that it was the bartender And tender was the operative word She had a body like a cello with legs, I mean, the ass was absurd Long neck, smooth skin, pretty face, cookie nipples Eyes as the hips, full lips between dimples She said "how did you sleep?" He said he didn't know She asked "was it good for you too?" "I think so But I really can't remember what went down last night" She told him "take off your shoes, we can replay the highlights" Stepped out the shower in a daze, legs achin' Breath short from the ep, dick wrapped in a hat Wide open cuz it was the last from a twelve-pack Spit four in the shower till his tire went flat She thought he was all that She said "I don't have to work today Take a little nap so we can do it again" No sooner than she said it, keys jingled, door slammed He said "please baby, please don't let it be your boyfriend For the love of basketball, Mademoiselle Look, I ain't Biggie Smalls, I don't even want a story to tell I'm a lover, not a fighter, alright" But then a girl walked in Saw him naked and said "What the hell?" Time stood still as he thought to himself "This reminds me of a beer commercial back in the day" She's too young to be her mother, so he asked "How you doin'? Would you care to join in?" She said, "nigga is you crazy? See this ring on my finger? That's my wife you was fuckin' My name ain't Ronald Isley, don't try to play me out She reached in her purse for the little pearl handle He splashed her in the face with the wax from the candle The tender ran back into the bathroom, screamin' Slipped on the condom wrapper, broke her pretty little neck The burnt-face wife pulled a gun on the dude Famous last words: "I ain't mean you no disrespect!" [Talking] Wow! That was crazy Yo J, that was cool and all (uh huh) But what's up with the violent ending, man? Is it possible for it to end a little more pleasant? [Hook] What if the story woulda ended like this? I'mma kick it again but only with a slight twist It goes one for the griot Two for da gods Three to flip the script, cuz it ain't that hard Check it out Time stood still as he thought to himself "This reminds me of a beer commercial back in the day" She's too young to be her mother "Would you care to join in?" She was buck naked under her coat He was amazed at the second wind kickin' in thinkin' 'bout the fact That he almost didn't go to the club. Woulda been wack If he missed out on the greatest love of his life Imagine if he stayed home with his wife Cuz girl two, yo, her body made the 'tender look like a fender bender The three of them together turned the bed to a blender He left like five hours later with a permanent cheese grill And feels he will forever remember [Talking] C'mon J (what?!) There's no way my man got laid quite like that It just don't happen (I mean, it could happen) It's like a porno or somethin' And what about his wife? She didn't even say nothin'? She didn't page him? [Hook] Time stood still as he thought to himself "This reminds me of a beer commercial back in the day" She's too young to be her mother, so he asked, "How you doin'?" She said "Eww! It smells like somebody been screwin'! I hope it wasn't y'all" Then she started laughin' He said "What's so funny?" She said "You don't know the half" She was starin' at the joint with a fucked-up smile She said "I can come back if you gon' be here for awhile But between me and you, and my roommate too What I'm 'bout to say might just be a little SNAFU In your plans. Put it like this, she used to be a dude!" (Yeah, how's that for a plot twist) He asked the 'tender was it true She said "Shit, I told you last night, my man, I thought you knew" [Talking] Ewww, shit! (Hahaha) For real? (Yeah, man) Uh uh, man you're sick (Hahaha) For real? You got dat homie, I'm out