Expectations

Fuck standards, fuck judgements, fuck expectations. I struggle to fit in but I'm still living life trying to find my placement. Fuck denial, fuck fears, fuck rejection. Sometimes we want to fight against it but we must remember that not stooping can be the greatest redemption. Fuck being excluded, fuck loneliness, and fuck isolation. We're all cold, and while we all have families, not all of us feel like we have someone with whom we share relation. Fuck doubters, fuck naysayers, and fuck those who aren't there. It's something people put their name to, but not many want to make the effort to prove that they actually care We've all done it, no matter how much we deny it, we're all something we once hated. In essence, we're all trying to live up to the expectations we set for those we feel didn't deserve to make it. Expectations set out in a black book with scriptures and paintings of what our lives should be, but little do they know we all paint different pictures. We're all artistic with ability to paint our own reality, but sometimes we sketch over our mistakes until our fears become actuality Our sins turn into shameful confessions, and home being where the heart is makes it ever-so-fitting that our faults what we're always addressing. We refuse to dwell on our positives because it's taken care of, or that's the perception. And while it's taken care of, when we ignore aspects of our lives, they become weaknesses and our mental strength becomes lighter than Caucasian complexion A long time coming, call it an extended orgasm, the knots in my back represent my stress but they are dismissed as chronic back spasms. A letter long overdue, an extended date with points deducted, sometimes I think about expectations most people stress over but I just say fuck it