Mambo Tail Tale

This story is based on true events Loosely based [Verse 1] I stepped into the spotlight, kinda uptight I don't really like the spotlight I was just there cause my main Guy asked me to stop by To celebrate the union of he and his wife I was like "fine" Wasn't really trying to leave him high and dry But I was only there to say "Hi" and "Bye" Wasn't really trying to hang around all night Bye and Bye, pretty young thing went and caught my eye They opened up wide My oh my! This chick is just about as fly as I am One of a kind, shorty look dime 5 plus 5, 1 plus 9 Chilling in the cut like iodine I rose up right, shimmied by her side Started talking that jive (Hello) "Hi, I'm Sandy" "You're fine, we can be fine and Sandy" "That'll be fine and dandy" "I really can't stand it to see you standing" "We should be dancing, that'd really be outstanding" She looked me in the eye And said "chill, loco, what I look like?" "Some old, silly, old video ho" "Like I'm here to dance with any Joe Schmoe" "Make me touch my toes? Oh noooo!" "I don't dance to this garbage" "This shit is retarded" "You better beg pardon, pronto" "Adios muchacho, unless you dance mambo" Now, I don't really know how the mambo go I don't know if you mambo fast If you mambo slow, if you mambo both Shorty looked fine though I was trying to, kick it like Tae Kwon Do So I said, "hell yeah, I can mambo, miss" "I am very head honcho-ish" Now of course I'm just talking shit Why she gonna call my bluff? This DJ playing all that Sambo stuff He ain't gonna play no mambo cuts At that point the shit just got bugged Shorty threw her fingers up, snapped them once Out of nowhere, some dudes just rolled up One had a trombone, the other had drums! (Fuck) This point, I got scared Homegirl obviously came prepared I thought the bouncers might spring into action They ain't do jack shit, they just stared The DJ made an announcement: "Everybody clear the dance floor please" "We got a special visit from the Mambo Queen" "And she about to show you how to mambo pro-per-ly" Then a spotlight shined and it landed on her and I I wished that I could run and hide Instant-ly, my hands got clammy, my mouth got dry Put in a bind because of my little white lie I was feeling contrite But I am not the type of guy to take flight When the stakes get high Said "I might as well try" (Might as well give it a shot) A dude start playing the congas Another dude starts strumming the bass A chick starts shaking maracas The crowd went bonkers Apparently, the band was quite popular It'd be improper and I'd be remiss If I ain't point out the fact That when the dude played the sax It went a little something like this: *Saxophone break* (I was a little nervous but I said:) ("You know what? Just dig inside yourself") ("And find what type of mambo, you got in your spirit, in your soul") [Verse 2] Learned from my B-Boy stance and I extended my hand And she grabbed it Then we started moving side to side It's kind of synchronized Like we planned it Then I started putting it down I started spinning her around real rapid Then I threw her up in the sky They thought I threw her too high But then I caught her astride when she landed It was fantastic I was going in hard like the race car dude From "Dancing With The Stars" No bullshit, went into a backflip Landed in a full split The crowd broke out in applause I was just a natural Me and homegirl got a standing O They cried for an encore more than once But we had to run back to her place She gave me the buns...The End