Being Haved

Yo (Jesus Crunchy, man) what happened? The POP! Nahmsayin I digs, nahmsayin I digs [Verse 1: Homeboy Sandman] I came up in Queens to not much more than enough A pure-bred sort of a mutt, if that could exist My moms/pops made livings but had limited funds We shopped at Kiefer for lunch, and favored for kicks (?) We had reefs, lights, mistletoe, garlands and such All the most Christmassy stuff, except for the gifts Party potluck, mom's ain't have a million bucks But when I came home with a bump, she gave it a kiss In grade school I was always at the head of the class And was the first head in the class to get any head Not that I condone pre-teens gettin it on But there is much more of them now, than what I knew then Whenever cats dissed momma I had honor-defend When I was done throwin them fists, I made a new friend Even at 9-10 wasn't bout no money to spend The only 'dough' that I would sweat, began with 'Ninten-', ya heard? [Hook] Swimmy my joint haaa to behave I would always say "mommy I'm being haved" We be in the street getting wild everyday What you might see on TV is Ricki Lake Swimmy my joint haaa to behave I would always say "mommy I'm being haved" We be in the street getting wild everyday Bow wow wow yippy yo yippy yay [Verse 2] I ran with a team of cats who swear to be hoods We was too hard to be marks, to cool to be nerds Did our homework but if you tried to play us for herbs We'd quickly assert you wasn't sayin nut'n but a word This when Hip-Hop really started making it's turn Cats would stop doing the Wop, doing the Worm Major venues still feel there was too much to lose Security at major concerts was a major concern Weekends, I be hooping from the dawn to the dusk Don't mean to boast, but in the post I couldn't be held My handle was type shaky but my drive to the hole Was such a fine sight to behold that people beheld Now let me not front, fabricate, or falsen the tale Sometimes a cat'd drop me a dime, at times I would sell But I never made a call unless I really got fouled And almost always hit the free throw anytime I ball-held [Hook] [Verse 3] ...My moms didn't do time-out We want'd to cry she'd give us something to cry 'bout I'd hump the mattress every time that I lie down This years before I thought of writing this rhyme out Grown folks would threaten putting soap into my mouth I never seen a red cent of my allowance But love finding out whenever something was not allowed Because I was down...(yeauh!) Upon to which chicks cuttin was a topic of choice I spent more time cuttin on friends, than cuttin from school I never got too crazy but I'll read'ly admit I used to hock loogeys from roofs and pee in the pool Before Timbo was a brand and only a boot I rocked Gels tryina be cute, and got ridiculed Told the same to every gang that ever tried to recruit I don't want no trouble, homey I'm just tryina be cool (peace) [Hook]