Blood, Tears and Pain

I slip and I fall, my head hits the concrete BLOOD spurts, engulfs my face, as Kitty licks, his tongue flicks My mother rushes in, her expression far from fun-filled A tear falls from her cheek, it touches my teeth, I try to blink His needle pierces my head, I wince: it hurts But I try not to blurt. He smiles: He's touched I know his name but at the moment, it does not matter In Argentina, I find myself staring at the altar They all give offerings but my heart's gone cold Staring at a platter of gold, their bread is nothing but MOLD To me. I toe the line between DISBELIEVER and DIVINE Descending into darkness, ugh! how I hate the light! I hate it when they smile! I hate it when the laugh! I haven't in awhile! So what reason do they have? If I could turn my insecurities inside out and paint the world with these impurities Blood would splatter the hallways, cries calling for security I stumble around in a daze Drunk from blood lust- the rage Sometimes it envelopes...i'm surprised At how much self-hate really resides Within My head is down, my hands on my thighs I struggle not to cry, I haven't done that in years But it hurts too much, I can't hold back the TEARS! A cascade of PAIN! Hot, boiling PAIN Impeded by my pride: No Longer Abel/Able, They Shall Call Me Cain And it all came together in the form of my birthday Every week, another reason to scream like Billy Mays... Every week, another reason to scream like Billy Mays... Every week, another reason to scream like BILLY MAYS...