Even Shadows Have Shadows

I stand alone Burned every bridge over the troubled water No longer hiding from my personality disorder A stronger tide is coming, I've been running Trying to function fine without my mind Climbing out this fucking corner I was born a thorn away from the rotten petals A forgotten rebel wrapped in the absence of heaven's heavy hands To develop an evident level of benevolence So it's probably better I sold my soul to the devil This is a message to anyone I've met that thinks they know me Don't pretend to understand none of the issues that I'm holding I was in a rush to grow up, look Mom no cuts Just a stomach in disgust, and the fear That I might go nuts this year If I don't slow up I'll see you on my way One day this shit'll kill me but I guess that it's OK I've lost all faith in a world so full of hate And I don't fucking love music I just use it to escape I'm caught between wanting to punch someone in the face And putting a bullet in my head to leave the human race Everything takes its toll but there's no tolls I can take I haven't yet found a good reason to be awake Introducing the corroded bones I hide behind my smile I'm angry at the universe for the way she treats me now It keeps me down, stealing all my energy I'm feeling like my enemy, concealing my identity Not dealing with my tendencies I peel the skin and then I squeeze The real imprinted Hansen's disease Not healing in this century, I'm kneeling to the entity Who built this penitentiary, as filthy as a centipede And guiltless in a sense cause he was willing to Just let me bleed, While I wore a game face In 10 years don't check for me I'll be in the same place This planet's just an overpopulated mental hospital Each zombie walk around constitutes another obstacle So here it is, I'm finally coming out my shell All 19 years of my life have been in conflict with myself I'm insecure about every facet of my existence From my addictions, to the condition I choose to live in Who you kidding, I suffer from excess anxiety A product of pollution in American society Stare into my eyes and see the hell that burns inside my mind And I no longer have an ego I can hide behind But I've been fine disregarding my insanity Every form of art isolates you from humanity But it's provoked against being force fed So fuck education for a decade and 3 years Of headaches from my peers Cause now I realize I could have learned more on my own They taught me how to know everything except my soul Which is everything I need to grow, everything that keeps me whole Everything that ever meant anything to Eyedea So I leap with golden hope to rip the leash that holds my focus But the fact remains the same, I'm still bound by chains It doesn't matter if your chain is 10 feet or 100 feet The fact remains the same, you're still bound by chains So people say I've changed, and it's harder to relate to me Good, I never liked you our friendship was make believe I'm peeling the mask back and revealing the rap that's been Filling my organs drilling short distorted portions Of morbid masochistic torture that unfortunately crafted An interest to orbit my portrait and inflict my image with disorder The minutes get shorter, walls start to close in Feels like the brain is hanging on by one clothespin I've hidden in the darkness for too long I make it look alright but on the inside its so wrong I want life to change but I don't know if it can For a man or machine or whatever the fuck I am I stand alone burned every bridge over the troubled water No longer hiding from my personality disorder You want to die my life well come and stay in madness's favorite little corner Cause even Shadows have Shadows And my secrets are eating me Eagerly feeding to scream my dreams away But they keep on defeating me (Even shadows have shadows) Welcome to the dusty subconscious of an actor Who murdered his childhood to stop the audience's laughter (Even shadows have shadows) How am I to break free from my fears When I don't like what I see And I can't feel what I hear? (Even shadows have shadows) So don't judge my book by its cover Cause my story's just as fucked up as any other!