My Dad's Gone Crazy

[Intro - Television show] Hello boys and girls! Today we're gonna talk about father and daughter relationships Do you have a daddy? I'll bet you do! Who's your daddy? [Hailie] Daddy, what are you doing? [Em + H] Okay then! Everybody, listen up! [Eminem] I'm goin to hell! Who's comin with me? [Hailie] Somebody please help him! I think my dad's gone crazy! [Verse 1] There's no mountain I can't climb, there's no tower too high No plane that I can't learn how to fly What do I gotta do to get through to you To show you there ain't nothing I can't take this chainsaw to [Hailie: Rahhnnn!] Fuckin' brains, brawn and brass balls I cut em off and got em pickled and bronzed in a glass jar Inside of a hall with my framed autographed sunglasses With Elton John's name on my drag wall I'm out the closet, I've been lying my ass off All this time me and Dre been fucking with hats off (Suck it Marshall!) So tell Laura and her husband to back off 'fore I push this motherfuckin' button and blast off And launch one at these Russians and that's all Blow every fucking thing except Afghanistan on the map off When will it stop? When will I knock the crap off? {*knocking*} Hailie, tell em baby - (My dad's lost it!) [Hook - Eminem + Hailie] There's really nothing else to say, I - I can't explain it (I think my dad's gone crazy!) A little help from Hailie Jade, won't you tell em baby (I think my dad's gone crazy!) There's nothing you could do or say that could ever change me (I think my dad's gone crazy!) There's no one on earth that can save me, not even Hailie (I think my dad's gone crazy!) [Verse 2] It's like my mother always told me Rana rana rana rana rana rana rana rana rana rana and Codeine And God dammit you little motherfucker If you ain't got nothing nice to say then don't say nothing ... Uh ... fuck that shit, bitch! Eat a motherfucking dick, chew on a prick And lick a million motherfucking cocks per second I'd rather put out a motherfucking gospel record I'd rather be a pussy-whipped bitch, eat pussy And have pussy lips glued to my face with a clit ring In my nose than quit bringing my flows Quit giving me my ammo; can't you see why I'm so mean? If y'all leave me alone this wouldn't be my M.O I wouldn't have to go eenee-meene-minie-moe Catch a homo by his toe, man I don't know no more Am I the only fuckin' one who's normal any more? (Dad!) [Hook] [Verse 3] My songs can make you cry, take you by surprise At the same time, can make you dry your eyes With the same rhyme; see, what you're seeing is a genius at work Which to me isn't work So it's easy to misinterpret it at first Cause when I speak, it's tongue-in-cheek I'd yank my fuckin' teeth Before I'd ever bite my tongue, I'd slice my gums Get struck by fuckin' lightning twice at once And die and come back as Vanilla Ice's son And walk around the rest of my life spit on And kicked and hit with shit every time I sung Like R. Kelly as soon as "Bump and Grind" comes on More pain inside of my brain than the eyes of a little girl Inside of a plane, aimed at the World Trade Standing on Ronnie's grave, screaming at the sky 'til clouds gather it's Clyde Mathers and Bonnie Jade And that's pretty much the gist of it The parents are pissed but the kids love it 9 millimeter heaters stashed in 2-seaters with meat cleavers I don't blame you, I wouldn't let Hailie listen to me neither [Hook] [Outro - Hailie] Ha ha ha ha! You're funny daddy!