Jock-O-Rama (Invasion of the Beef Patrol)

You really like gorillas? We've got just the pet for you It's the way you're forced to act to survive our schools Make your whole life revolve around sports, walk tough, don't act too smart Be a mean machine, then we'll help you get ahead Jock-o-Rama, save my soul We're under the thumb of the beef patrol The future of America is in their hands Watch it roll over Niagara Falls Pep rally in the holy temple and you're forced to go Masturbate en masse with the favored religious cult Cheerleaders yell "ra ra team" from the locker room parades the prime beef When archaeologists dig this up they'll either laugh or cry Jock-o-Rama on the brain Redneck-a-thon driving me insane The future of America is in their hands Watch it roll over Niagara Falls Unzip that old-time religion On the almighty football field Beer bellies of all ages Come to watch the gladiators bleed "Now boys, this game ain't played for fun You're going out there to win How do you win? Get out there and snap the other guy's knee" Beat 'em up! Beat 'em up! Ra Ra Ra! Snap those spinal cords Ha Ha Ha! Beat 'em up! Beat 'em up! Ra Ra Ra! Snap those spinal cords Ha Ha Ha! The star quarterback lies injured Unconscious on the football field Looks like his neck's been broken Seems to happen somewhere every year His mom and dad clutch themselves and cry Their favorite son will never walk again Coach says "That boy gave a hundred percent What spirit, what a man!" But who cares? Game's over! Let's go get wasted, man! To the 7-11, to the liquor store! Let's party all night and party some more! Another Trans-Am's wrapped itself around a telephone pole "I ain't drunk officer, I just fell getting out of my car" "Don't worry about it, son, we were that way when we were young You've got all the skills to make a damn good businessman" Jock-o-Rama, save my soul We're under the thumb of the beef patrol The future of America is in their hands Watch it roll over Niagara Falls Jock-o-Rama, that's the law Come lick the butts of the beef patrol If the future of America is handed to them Watch it roll over Niagara Falls