(800) Human

Are you sick of not existing? Does your halo just not flatter your face? Feel brand new in just three easy payments Try it free What it’s like to be But wait there’s more! The sky is not the limit The body you have always wanted Let us put you in it Bad karma? no karma? you too can get a life And it’s all for the low, low price of… What it’s like to be human What it’s like to be alive No returns and no exchanges And of course at first you won’t know what your fucking name is Void where prohibited or if your lover leaves Putrefaction guaranteed Just call the number on your screen, (800)… (chorus) On earth as it is in heaven Condemned to be free And yes, even angels fall for legalese So lead us not into late night TV But deliver us, no CODs (chorus) ’cause all anybody knows Is how the jingle goes