You're The Top

[RENO] Billy, where's the old Crocker confidence? You think he's got one tiny fraction of your brains, your looks, your...your... At words poetic, I'm so pathetic That I always have found it best Instead of getting 'em off my chest To let 'em rest unexpressed I hate parading my serenading As I'll probably miss a bar But if this ditty is not so pretty Att least it'll tell you How great you are You're the top! You're the Colosseum You're the top! You're the Louvre Museum. You're a melody from a symphony by Strauss You're a Bendel bonnet A Shakespeare sonnet You're Mickey Mouse You're the Nile, You're the Tower of Pisa, You're the smile on the Mona Lisa I'm a worthless check, a total wreck, a flop But if, baby, I'm the bottom you're the top! [BILLY] Your words poetic are not pathetic On the other hand, babe, you shine And I can feel after every line A thrill divine Down my spine Now gifted humans like Vincent Youmans Might think that your song is bad But I got a notion I'll second the motion And this is what I'm going to add; You're the top! You're Mahatma Gandhi. You're the top! You're Napoleon Brandy. You're the purple light Of a summer night in Spain You're the National Gallery You're Garbo's salary You're cellophane You're sublime You're turkey dinner You're the time of the Derby winner I'm a toy balloon that is fated soon to pop But if, baby, I'm the bottom You're the top! [RENO] You're the top! You're an Arrow collar You're the top! You're a Coolidge dollar You're the nimble tread Of the feet of Fred Astaire You're an O'Neill drama [BILLY] You're Whistler's mama, [RENO] You're camembert [BILLY] You're a rose You're Inferno's Dante, [RENO] You're the nose On the great Durante I'm just in a way As the French would say, "de trop" But if, baby, I'm the bottom You're the top! [BILLY] You're the top! You're a dance in Bali You're the top! You're a hot tamale You're an angel, you Simply too, too, too diveen You're a Boticcelli, [RENO] You're Keats [BILLY] You're Shelly [RENO] You're Ovaltine. [BILLY] You're a boon You're the dam at Boulder You're the moon Over Mae West's shoulder I'm the nominee of the G.O.P [RENO] Or GOP! [BILLY] But if, baby, I'm the bottom You're the top! [RENO] You're the top! You're a Waldorf salad You're the top! You're a Berlin ballad You're the boats that glide On the sleepy Zuider Zee You're an old Dutch master [BILLY] You're Lady Astor, [RENO] You're broccoli You're romance You're the steppes of Russia You're the pants on a Roxy usher I'm a broken doll, a fol-de-rol, a blop [BOTH] But if, baby, I'm the bottom You're the top!