The Birds and the Bees

[Intro :Andy Milonakis] Oh my God, that's him, that's him, that's Dirt Nasty Oh my Gosh, go ask him No you ask him, no you! But I'm scared Okay, hey Dirt Nasty I-I asked my mom, where babies come from, and she says a stork bring them down from heaven, is that true? [Verse 1: Dirt Nasty] Well let me break it down for you kid Ain't no stork done dropped off shit (what?) Ain't no Santa, no Easter Bunny, no tooth fairy and bitches want money See your mom gave dad some head, he shoulda pulled out and nutted on the bed Instead, nine months later, you plopped out your moms fat ass during labor (hehe) But mommy was a player, you might be your dads but you prolly your neighbor's Came out all sloppy and shit, crying like a bitch, suckin' her tits See that's what God intended, but Lord have mercy the twat's infected (what's a twat?) As the doc cut the umbilical he saw your cock and said fuck you're pitiful Now here you are seven years later and your dick ain't grown a fucking centimeter (that's true) How can I teach you profilactic, just stick the plan with your tiny little fat dick [Hook] Let me teach you the birds and the bees, it's kindda easy like A B C If you feel like it burns when you pee, put a rubber on your dick for the STD (that's right) Let me teach you the birds and the bees (stupid), public service from Dirt Nasty (dumb shit) See that little red dot on your meat? Put a rubber on your dick then act like me Doggy style, that's the shit, girl on top, squeeze her tit, missionary, nah thats lame, choke a bitch, what's my name? (Dirt Nasty) [Andy Milonakis] Hey my brother showed me a weird slimy balloon that he says protects him from diseases, what's a diseases? [Verse 2: Dirt Nasty] Alright here we go (ladies and gentlemen) Alright kid, hold this beer, let me make this crystal-fucking-clear I don't know if they make baby trojans, but if they do pull it down to the scrotum Ever seen dad, scratch real bad, it ain't poison-oak, they call it the crabs Ever seen sis, hiss when she piss, clenching the fist, that's syphilis And when mommy make doc appointments, it ain't the flu, she need vajayjay-ointments And don't go sharing slurpies, 'cuz little Karen is carrying herpes Dick hurt? Burn when you pee? Then put a Jimmy on your little wee-wee Better wrap that rascal, especially if you put it in a chick asshole Don't trust no ho, and if the pinky's stinky, run for the backdoor When the cooch is loose, that means she's a slut, you silly goose Pussy tight? Hit it like a champ, oh yeah, watch out for the tramp-stamp The bitches disease, so beware the wrath of the wizard sleeve [Hook] [Outro] [Dirt Nasty] Now I hope you kids learned a valuable lesson, now excuse I gotta go to the clinic [Andy Milonakis] Oh, I get it now, babies come out of girls pussy holes (yes), and your should always use condoms (mmh, maybe) Vaginas are stinking dirty filthy germicidal fuckholes filled with poss and ooze (you've been listening) Thanks Dirty Nasty, I really learned something today, now that I know about the birds and the bees I'm gonna go get my dick sucked [Dirt Nasty] Alright you kids get some head