Befriend The Friendless Friendster

[Busdriver] Let's make friends And not refer to rap monikers and astronomers And be fun-loving I'll give you roses, about one dozen Everyone one at this party is so dumb and aloof But you pry open closed minds like a sunroof And you're interplanetary And they're hindered while you're candid and carefree Your impression of that political figure was done with cynical vigor And it was so fucking funny You're a conduit of impromptu skits If your karma's bad You need to disrobe That armor-clad xenophobe that resides in your innards Before you die and wither Your inner playground's full of cobwebs But I'll help you reach that obtainable godhead Through Tai Chi stretching And improvised rapping So what if the posh are wed to the idea That we're bastardized and crossbred? They can't hint the live acts' whim Or synthesize the vaccine (chorus) They await the star's hardened prick And his guitar pick made of arsenic But my sardonic wit goes far beyond it Let's forget the rock star ethos And go to the underground celebrity roast And make some friends And forsake the trends We'll throw rocks at tanks Erase the programs Leave the robots blank And curb the spending habits Through serendipity Let's make friends Is it all ages or 21 and over? Because Miss Honey Bun is older than a pre-teen TV screen I suggest let's run with the sun at our shoulders I have money in my gun holster And several drink tickets But by the end of our interaction You'll probably think I need to pay a shrink a visit Because tonight I'll treat you like girl meat Dressed in a sesame seed bun Asking you and your homegirl if you're interested in a threesome But I'm out of line Because you're an under-sexed lady cop But you rubbernecked when I came in the spot I gave you enough respect or maybe not You're the cashier at Wal-Mart kissing the traveling man I'll give you a papsmear a la carte In our 15-passenger van at my show The ephemeral girlfriend with extra baby fat Courted by the LA megalomaniac And you're much more friendly than the rats I know I tried to foster a newfound love that a kiss led to Oh how I misread you And I just tried to be the downest homie But our friendship was short-lived you weren't supportive And saw I had a speech impediment like Pork Pig But to say we can't be friends is not so We can go to a hip-hop show and join arms In unison at the soy farm (chorus) They await the star's hardened prick And his guitar pick made of arsenic But my sardonic wit goes far beyond it Let's forget the rock star ethos And go to the underground celebrity roast And make some friends And forsake the trends We'll throw rocks at tanks Erase the programs Leave the robots blank And curb the spending habits Through serendipity