Ironic

My dog's stomach was very upset So, we put him in the car And, we went to the vet And on our way to the vet I killed a cat I say Isn't that ironic? I adopted a child from overseas To rescue him from child labor factories And on his very first birthday We went to Build-A-Bear workshop Isn't that I-R-O-N-I-C-I-N-O-R-I Yes And, a waterpark is burned to the ground And, a tow truck is broken down I always used to cry when I laughed But, then I was raped by a clown I was watching Al Gore on CNN He was talking about the environment and then Out of boredom My pet polar bear shot himself Dated an animal rights activist One day she got really pissed Because I was eating veal That was wrapped in PETA bread I-R-O-N-I-C-I-N-O-R-I Yeah, I said I'm a stand-up comic But, I always sit and slouch And I got my girlfriend pregnant On my sterile uncle's pull out couch I-R-O-N-I-C-I-N-O-R-I, Ironic Yeah Everyday you play the board game RISK You've probably never taken a risk in your life And Monopoly has far from a stranglehold On the board game market And a little kid died from Suffocation When he choked on a game piece from Operation And I can't grow a beard But, that one's not ironic That one's just sad Bob Barker got all of my pets pregnant My grandfather has Alzheimer's And, one day we were...