Harper Valley PTA

[Verse 1] I wanna tell you all the story about the Harper Valley widow wife Who had a teenage daughter who attended Harper Valley Junior High Well her daughter came home one afternoon and didn't even stop to play She said mom I got a note here from the Harper Valley PTA [Verse 2] Well the note said Mrs Johnson you're wearing your dresses way too high And it's reported you've been drinking and a running round with men and going wild And we don't believe you oughta be a bringing up your little girl this way And it was signed by the secretary Harper Valley PTA [Verse 3] Well it happened that the PTA was gonna meet that very afternoon And they were sure surprised when Mrs Johnson wore her miniskirt into the room And as she walked up to the blackboard I can still recall the words she had to say She said I'd like to address this meeting of the Harper Valley PTA [Verse 4] Well there's Bobby Taylor sittin' there and seven times he asked me for a date And Mrs Taylor sure seems to use a lot of ice whenever he's away And Mr Baker can you tell us why your secretary had to leave this town And shouldn't widow Jones be told to keep Her window shades all pulled completely down [Verse 5] Well Mr Harper couldn't be here cause he stayed too long at Kelly's Bar again And if you smell Shirley Thompson's breath you'll find she's had a little nip of gin And when you have the nerve to tell me as a mother you think I'm not fit Well this is just a little Payton Place and you're all Harper Valley hypocrites [Outro] No I wouldn't put you on because it really did it happened just this way The day her mama socket it to the Harper Valley PTA The day her mama socket it to the Harper Valley PTA The day her mama socket it to the Harper Valley PTA