Satan Gave Me A Taco

[Verse] Satan gave me a taco and it made me really sick The chicken was all raw and the grease was mighty thick The rice was all rancid and the beans were so hard I was getting kinda dizzy eating all the lard There was aphids on the lettuce and i ate every one An' after i was done the salsa melted off my tongue Pieces of tortilla got stuck in my throat An' the stains on my clothes burned a hole through my coat My stomach was a-trembling and i broke out in a rash I was so dry and thirsty and i didn't have no cash So i went and found a hose, tore off all my clothes Turned on the water and it shot right up my nose Some old lady came along and she thought i was a freak So she beat me with a handbag till i could hardly speak I was lying there naked, my body badly bruised In a pool of my own blood, unconscious and confused Well, the cops came and got me and threw me in their van And i woke up on the ceiling and i couldn't find my hand They took me to the judge, his eyes a-glowing red The courtroom was filled with witches and the dead Well, the sheriff was a hell-hound with fangs and claws The prisoners were tied up and chained to the walls The air was getting thick; the smoke was getting thicker The judge read the verdict: said, "cut off his head!" Well, they placed me on the altar, and they raised up the axe My head was about to explode when i noticed the marshall stacks I noticed all the smoke machines, cameras and the lights Some guy with a microphone, running around dancing in tights And i noticed the crew and the band playing down below And i realized i was in a rock video So i went and joined the band and i went out on tour And i smoked a lot of heroin and i passed out in manure I made out with the groupies, started fires backstage I made a lot of money and i gave it all away Well, the band got killed, so i started a solo career And i won all the awards and i drank all the beer I opened up a taco stand just to smell the smell Cooking with the devil, frying down in hell