Never Do Anything

[Verse 1] Wiped out down the stairs I'll bet you there's a song in there I'm not sure I'm prepared to write it down That guy should be me I'd look much better on TV Then the world would see That I can do anything [Chorus] I can be that But soon you'll see that I will never do anything [Verse 2] Let's play tic-tactoe I'll play X, you can be the O Thoughts of turning pro Have crossed my mind I could make a mint Fill my pockets with more than lint I'll give you a hint It involves the "internet" [Chorus]x2 [Verse 3] Don't write me off as an also ran Just mark me down as an angry man Got a big chip, you want a fat lip? How 'bout a mouthful of Chiclets? Life passed me by, but it's not my fault I'll lick my wounds, could you pass the salt? I can be that, but soon you'll see that I will never do anything If I were the king All my subjects they would dance and sing They could kiss my ring And kiss my ass When I'm old and grey I'll look back on my life and say "Give me one more day And I'll still never do anything." [Chorus]x4