The Harbor Is Yours

Reeeeeemix! ...Throw your babies in the air [Hook: Rob Sonic] Dead men tell no tales (Uh-huh) Up push the daisies till the soil is stale In a powder blue tux for the farmer's sale (Here we go) Mr. Big sleep with the carp and kelp [Aesop Rock] Once upon a time in the days of yore When the people lived fresh outta legend and folklore There was an old pirate who piloted vile slang Had a bird perched on him and swash buckled the same Peg leg navigate him starboard to port By the nautical starry night yelling "The harbor is yours!" And you should tell them where you situate the gold That is unless you'd like a vacation with Davy J-J-J-Jones Like "walk the plank" for whom the shark thank Maroon the mutineers consume the souvenirs And while the shiny spoils piled higher every year He was suffocating slow in the box of a buccaneer Ten summers prior on a night like this Crows nest scopes something afloat to the boats west Swore it blew him a kiss When he focus seen the face of an angel upon the body of a F-f-f-fish "What the heck!" frazzled, his telescope shattered Gathered himself she was ghost he was down the rope ladder To deck circled the vessel 360 swiftly Found nothing in the water but salt, piss and whiskey Yarr, heckled by the swabbies at the bar He'll be the laughing stock of the Barbary Coast War Like this dude either got two glass eyes Or he wearing his patch on the wrong s-s-s-side Now he knew what he saw But had to prove he was raw So he raped and he pillaged and And he feud and he brawled Try to rekindle his rep via sabers and gun smoke And vowed to always find her though he never told his cutthroats Meanwhile, back in the now, got a brand new skeleton crew On the move out when they aren't manning thirty burning cannons stern and bow They are prying shiny metals out your m-m-m-mouth Okay, youth wanes old age holler wisdom and disease Like the scurvy made his yellow gums bleed And he was achy from his boots to the feather in his hat Until his quartermaster showed up with a stolen treasure map One look down and lept off the dock See if you can guess where X marked the spot The capital was buried at sea in a cursed cave Only one mile from where he'd seen the mer-mer-mer-maid Anchors up, hoist the jolly roger thank you much Day and night with his hook hands raised and clutched But see the vitamin deficiency was strong So by the time they bumped into the island he could barely lift his grog Crawled off the boat, collapsed in the sand Prayers in the air, seashells in his hand And nary a high tide so grand as the one that put The lady of the lake on dry la-la-la-land I wish I could tell you that it ended happy Pretend like his bones weren't practically snapping Pretend like her gills didn't dry up and suffer But that's a half-dead pirate and a fish outta water No lie, scout's honor, got a million more From the burgundy lighting above the shores of whores Before your visions of grandeur go to swell those sails Remember dead men tell no t-t-t-tales [Hook] Dead men tell no tales ..Dead men tell no tales ..Dead men tell no tales