9 - Yes, Today

"[1] Yesterday I had to check myself a couple times— Write a couple rhymes Hit my brother line Ask if it’s another sign I ain’t had enough of trying But I’m wearing down Feels like another obstacle I’m staring down And I feel like sharing now So I tell him how I feel He feel me and he tell me, “That’s how everybody feel.” And I know it, but I wanna wallow just a little longer— Stay up on the phone until I feel a little stronger Judge me if you wanna. I ain’t got a worry Tomorrow is another day. I ain’t tryna hurry Vision kind of blurry. Hoping to see better Better see the better in the day before it’s “Yes to…” [2] Last night I bought a bottle, and prob’ly shouldn’t be saying it I ain’t drink it, but think it’s a metaphor for my day It’s the way it can make you feel Like nothing’s really a deal The pleasure and the appeal Is waiting behind the seal Just break it open and guzzle it Feel it, and then say “fuck it.” Since nothing is permanent, my sobriety had it’s turn and it’s time Resigned to the life that I live now My cup is filled up, I don’t want it to spill out To see it pouring down the drain is therapeutic I know it sounds insane to say I never want to do it again But still spend what I earned to make that purchase That kind of temptation is dangerous. Is it worth it?"